on a lighter note...

Power converter from the cigarette lighter plug
 
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I see how the mistake could be made, I married what I thought was a human female and turned out she was an asshole all along!
I thought I married a lady but it turned out she was a whore type and could not keep her legs together when I was away working. Life is better now she is gone.
 
I thought I married a lady but it turned out she was a whore type and could not keep her legs together when I was away working. Life is better now she is gone.
Yup
 
Hell of a shift today...Two medics on my truck, we had two wrecks, two refusals. The second one was paged as what sounded like "car versus church." Nope! Car versus turkey. EMS director said "we don't resuscitate turkeys." I said if the turkey is dead, it's coming back here. She made loud noises like she was vomiting.

Well....No humans were injured during the making of this meal! The one leg was inside the truck between the door and front seat. Guts all over inside. Looked like that one was eating worms and shredded cheese.

I walked a good distance back, trying to locate the rest of the bird to no avail. Coyotes will get that one.

The director was long gone when I got back with supper.

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Last edited by a moderator:
Better than a Flu Shot!

Miss Beatrice, The church organist, Was in her eighties And had never been married. She was admired for her
sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea... As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of the organ. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated of all things, a condom!
When she returned With tea and scones, they began to chat The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity About the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. 'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this? Pointing to the bowl. 'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter.
 
I see how the mistake could be made, I married what I thought was a human female and turned out she was an asshole all along!
Until now I was unaware that my EX wife had a twin sister
 
This is fake news,people!!
A Canadian would NEVER plant bud lite beer!!!
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Maude and Ethel met at a restaurant for breakfast one morning and as they were sitting across from each other, Maude remarked "Ethel, did you know you have a suppository in your ear"? Maude replied "Oh Heavens. Now I know where I put my hearing aid".
 
Hell of a shift today...Two medics on my truck, we had two wrecks, two refusals. The second one was paged as what sounded like "car versus church." Nope! Car versus turkey. EMS director said "we don't resuscitate turkeys." I said if the turkey is dead, it's coming back here. She made loud noises like she was vomiting.

Well....No humans were injured during the making of this meal! The one leg was inside the truck between the door and front seat. Guts all over inside. Looked like that one was eating worms and shredded cheese.

I walked a good distance back, trying to locate the rest of the bird to no avail. Coyotes will get that one.

The director was long gone when I got back with supper.

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What, you couldn’t get a IO in that bird? Lol
Looks like good eating, maybe not enough to feed entire house. But first come first serve....
 

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Headshot on jackal this morning

Mature Eland Bull taken in Tanzania, at 100 yards, with 375 H&H, 300gr, Federal Premium Expanding bullet.

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