Pet peeves?

Discussion in 'Hunting Africa' started by TOM, Jul 4, 2017.

  1. Kowas Hunting Safaris

    Kowas Hunting Safaris SPONSOR Since 2017 AH Fanatic

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  2. dobber

    dobber AH Enthusiast

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    Mine covers across the globe
    using the term hunters when talking about poachers, they are to hunting as rapists are to being lovers

    PH's shorts, they really don't need to be that short lol
     
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  3. G Skinner

    G Skinner AH Fanatic

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    Custom agents coming or going who don't know shit !
    Glen
     
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  4. Lrntolive

    Lrntolive AH Fanatic

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    Oh my, the list is much too long.
     

  5. GuttormG

    GuttormG AH Enthusiast

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    Using Africa instead of the name of the country you are in/going to/went to/talk about..
     
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  6. Bruce

    Bruce AH Elite

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    PLENTY other beer brands plus Pepsi... not sure where you were looking?? :D
     
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  7. WRudman

    WRudman AH Veteran

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    There is even Mountain Dew
     
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  8. Adam S

    Adam S AH Veteran

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    I'm in!
     

  9. Velo Dog

    Velo Dog AH ENABLER GOLD SUPPORTER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Tape measures.
    These are best reserved for carpentry work, not the ancient and distinguished culture of hunter - gatherer.
    If hunting is nothing more than a Jr. High School level contest for you, I recommend you confront your parents and ask them to love you unconditionally.

    Over- bore cartridges (Lazzeroni, Weatherby, ultra-blah, blah, blah - whatever red line high pressure / super velocity thing many of my fellow Americanos dig on since the 1950's).

    Muzzle brakes (or, if you chew tobacco and throw up every 2 minutes ....... then it's probably; muzzle "breaks".)

    Stainless steel.

    Plastic stocks (especially thumbhole ones).

    Fluted barrels.

    Over powered rifle scopes.

    White line spacers.

    Scopes with so many options that, old farts like me have to read a schematic to use the damn thing.

    Obese people invading my space on the already sardine can-like plane rides (two days of flying from Alaska, just to Johannesburg then, whatever smaller planes from there to wherever.)

    No scotch in camp, only bourbon (time for armed revolt!).

    Noisy, undisciplined children in camp that, torment old creeps like me every evening.

    Fruity liquor.
    Sorry Mr. Spike.T, but if I ever make it to Takeri, I plan to pay you extra to put in an adequate supply of Bombay Saphire ("Mother's Ruin" as you call it).

    People who think hunting "concessions" do not exist in South Africa (such as Maruli, Timbivati and others).

    Cooks who put sugar in pasta sauce.

    Cooks who don't put anchovies in pasta sauce.

    I could go on all night but, it's cocktail hour here in Alaska or, within 3 hours of same and I'm powerful thirsty.

    Cheers.
     
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2017
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  10. MPN

    MPN AH Senior Member

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    Sounds like a few of you may have skipped your AA meetings... who the hell cares what you drink...you are in Africa...Hunting!
    Give me the sweat off a goats udder and point me in the direction of something to hunt!
     

  11. Velo Dog

    Velo Dog AH ENABLER GOLD SUPPORTER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Ok so, perhaps my last post was not perceived by some folks as comically as I had hoped, maybe even a bit abrasive to some.
    Therefore, if anyone was offended by my twisted sense of humor, I apologize.
    Except of course to Mr. Spike.T, as I have it on good authority that his sense of humor is at least as demented as mine.
    (Damn the orange flavored vodka and full speed ahead).
     
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  12. cagkt3

    cagkt3 AH ENABLER PLATINUM SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    I for one enjoy your twisted sense of humor, as it matches mine quite well!
     
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  13. spike.t

    spike.t AH ENABLER SPONSOR Since 2013 AH Ambassador

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    Mr VD the bombay sapphire is already in the bar......as there are some here that quaff it also...so no excuses now ;) :D Beers:
     
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  14. Hogpatrol

    Hogpatrol AH ENABLER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Pet peeves? "Hunters" that go anywhere to "hunt" and spend too much time imbibing and "hunters" that use hunting as an excuse to get away from their wives. Example, on one trip, there were two Europeans who upon arrival day, downed EIGHT bottles of wine. The next morning, one missed the same kudu at 150m, then 100m, then 75m. If all you want to do on a safari is get away from your spouse and get buzzed, there are other, more safe venues.
    Edit: One more, people that believe money buys experience and skill. This one is an epidemic in the shooting sports.
     
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2017
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  15. Velo Dog

    Velo Dog AH ENABLER GOLD SUPPORTER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    MPN, Hogpatrol,

    I agree with you that, if any safari company is in the practice of double-booking / mixing groups simultaneously into a hunting camp, I too would be unhappy upon arriving, only to just discover it then (too late to book with a better outfit).
    An exception for me however, would be if the outfit contacted me about it, in plenty of time for me to ask why they felt they should invite unknown persons to my vacation and also, in plenty of time to discuss it with my hunting companions, before deciding to agree to it or not.
    In that circumstance, and with the PH vouching for the extra visitor's peace and quiet loving personalities (his prior experience with them) I have in the past agreed to it (and it worked out well).
    Conversely, two fellows downing 8 bottles of wine the night before, I totally agree is a recipe for disaster in the bush.
    If nothing else, I'd worry toss and turn that, said drunkards might try to tinker with their firearms that night, within range of my not bullet proof hut.

    In furtherance of this, I agree with you that, spending a pile of money to fly over-seas and drink like a fish, and / or to escape and evade the old ball & chain, is a pitiful waste of cash and energy.
    Among several other topics, I joke about alcohol but, it's mostly because I was raised by fiercely Baptist parents who, in practice were essentially about the same doctrine as Mennonite (not that there's anything wrong with that).
    Those who know me well or, at least have attended one of my annual, sometimes bi-annual "Hunter's Party" gatherings, will tell you I actually use very little alcohol.
    But, I do regularly enjoy making fun of myself and alcohol is such an easy target.
    (Hangovers are for college kids and GI's home on leave).

    Also, another favorite target of my sometimes nut house humor is; Sports ("Soap Opera for men").
    In that regard, my family's "splinter Baptist" church would not associate with other churches, not even other Baptist ones, because they felt all others were "not firmly grounded in The Word".
    This exclusivism was, except for the fact that they would play sports games in the local church leagues, because the Preacher and his spoiled brat son were intense sports fans so, I often make jokes about "grown men getting excited, even violently angry, over what amount to activities designed to help children burn off excess energy".

    At least I know where my dragons-in-need-of-slaying were born (and poking fun at same is my delight).

    Well anyway, cheerio for now,
    Velo Dog.
     
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  16. LivingTheDream

    LivingTheDream AH Legend

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    Interesting in the mix camp thing. I hunt a lot by myself (I'm young and all I care about is hunting, and not all of my friends have a desire to spend every dollar hunting or enjoy spending there vacations waking up early and walking all day through thorn bushes). I joined a group of 8, I think we overlapped for 2 days. The outfitter checked before hand with the group, they were cool with it, and I enjoyed talking hunting with them. They were awesome, partied more then I did but I didn't mind. It's their vacation too. And I had another couple at another camp. The gentlemen smoked cigars and I did too, he and his wife were awesome and great to joke with. As long as they don't impact my hunting I don't really care.

    As far the liquor thing goes. I'm a good Irishman and as long as it is front of me it is good to me. But I rarely drink on a hunting trip, kind of like to take everything in.
     
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  17. gizmo

    gizmo AH ENABLER SPONSOR Since 2015 AH Ambassador

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  18. Ryan

    Ryan AH Fanatic

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    Fruity liquor.
    Sorry Mr. Spike.T, but if I ever make it to Takeri, I plan to pay you extra to put in an adequate supply of Bombay Saphire ("Mother's Ruin" as you call it).

    @Velo Dog, sneak a bottle of that smoked salmon flavored vodka one of the distillers here makes into his camp. That'll cure anyone of an interest in flavored vodka. *Heave*


    Tee hee hee hee.
     

  19. Velo Dog

    Velo Dog AH ENABLER GOLD SUPPORTER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Smoked salmon vodka .... vomitosis!
     
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  20. duckman90

    duckman90 AH Senior Member

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    I hate when you see a hunter who can't even load their own guns, let alone shoot accurately tell you that they stopped a buffalo/lion/hippo charge at 3 feet. I hunted ducks with a guy who did this. (He was the boss of one of my hunting buddies.)
    (He swore he was a huge hunter, hunts everything from small game to large all over the world. Has hunted in Africa more times than he can count ect. He came out with a Remington 11-87 and couldn't even load it himself. First flight of ducks came in and he opened up on them at pushing 150 yards... the next group came in and we had him wait got them wings tucked straight in 5ft off the water at 30 yards he missed 3 times, wasn't even close.)

    As soon as this happened he decided to tell everyone about the time he had to stop a lion charge by himself because his PH dropped his rifle and ran up the nearest tree.....:E Doh:

    (P.S. I called his nonsense and ask for the PH's name and info because I was going to report him to the AfricanPHA. This silenced him immediately.)

    *He didn't even offer to help pick up decoys...
     
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