on a lighter note...

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On holiday in Sardinia at the moment they burn coffee grounds to keep wasps away. They mix it with a little tuna oil. Seems to work. Although had a young American couple move away from us last night complaining about the smoke and pointing at the no smoking signs
:ROFLMAO: When we left they had there food on a corner table and where doing a wasp jig:X3:;) should have gone with the smoking coffee capisce!
 
Alexander Pushkin

The Gold and the Sword

"It’s all mine," the Gold asserted;
"It’s all mine," replied the Sword.
"I’ll buy all," the Gold retorted;
"I’ll take all," rejoined the Sword.
 
If you held it just right you could really make it squeak.

Like fingernails squalling on a blackboard. Spqual chalk on the blackboard just to watch nearly everyone cringe at the sound.

My laughing out loud is what would get me in trouble. Sometimes with a few minutes of after school detention writing some sort of sentence a number between 25 and 100 times.
 
My father read everything he could about Howard Hughes (we lived in Las Vegas when Hughes was living in the penthouse of the Desert Inn hotel and casino, and my father was a dealer there). He told me this story:

An employee of Hughes was "seeing" one of Hughes' gals, and he instructed one of his henchmen to "take care of the guy." The guy got word of this, so he bought a revolver and ammo for self protection, and went into the desert to practice with it as it was his first handgun. At some point there was a hang fire, and not knowing the correct protocol, pointed the muzzle at his face (!) and BANG! he killed himself.

When Hughes learned the guy was dead (but not the whole story), he told his guy, "Good job!"
 
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