on a lighter note...

classic_paintings_mash_up_surprising_well_with_hip_hop_lyrics_25_photos19_1404088839.jpg
 
Late snow here in Ludifisk Land today,,which surprised me since this usually happens in May
 
WHY GRANDPAS ARE DIFFERENT

Have you ever wondered what the difference is between Grandmothers and Grandfathers? Well, here it is:

There was this loving grandfather who always made a special effort to spend time with his son's family on weekends. Every Saturday morning he would take his 5-year-old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for some quality time -- pancakes, ice cream, candy-- just him and his granddaughter.

One particular Saturday, however, he had a terrible cold and could not get out of bed. He knew his granddaughter always looked forward to their drives and would be very disappointed. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and said that she would take their granddaughter for her weekly drive and breakfast.

When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her grandfather who was still in bed. "Well, did you enjoy your ride with grandma?" he asked.

Not really, PaPa, it was boring.......

We didn't see a single asshole, piece of shit, horse's ass, socialist left wing Obama lover, blind bastard, dip shit, Muslim camel humper or son of a bitch anywhere we went!" We just drove around and Grandma smiled at everyone she saw. I really didn't have any fun.

'Almost'.....brings a tear to your eye
 
A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotch-less panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband. At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs ... enough times that her husband finally asks, "Are you wearing crotch-less panties?" "Y-e-s," she answers with a seductive smile. "Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat." He never heard the shot.
 
Because of my rather distinct Chicago accent When I took a job as the Chef at a downtown hotel in Minneapolis the Wait Staff was afraid to come in the kitchen
 
A Irishman, Scotsman and British man all walk into a bar. They each order a Guinness and are about to drink it, when, at the exact same time three flies land into each gentleman's' drink.

The British man declares 'That is disgusting!" and walks out the the bar.

The Scotsman calmly picks the fly up, tosses it on the ground and takes a sip of his drink.

The Irishman roughly grabs the fly by the wings, looks it in the eyes and loudly yells "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT NOW!"
 

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Catchaser wrote on Philip Glass's profile.
Phillip I was reviewing some of the auctions online and saw your Nubian Ibex hunt coming up this weekend. It also showed you have Addax and Axis deer. Is there a website I can go to and see the lodge, cost of animals and what is available? Thanks Mark
Marcus bock wrote on sgt_zim's profile.
Appreciate your Limcroma/Franco comments. Will be seeing him in April....again. great person as well as his family (he has a new born son). I will always recommend him who makes a hunt special and exciting. Marc
James Friedrichs wrote on Nicaburns's profile.
I really like that knife you're selling. It looks so similar to my original 1306 that has been around a long time. I can't spend that much but if you get to a point where you'd entertain offers let me know. Thx, James
 
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