on a lighter note...

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Aunt Emily's husband died a few weeks ago and the house was so quiet she had trouble adapting. Her husband was always talking to her, or his friends on the phone so this made it doubly hard. One of her friends suggested she get a couple parrots and maybe listening to them all day would break up the silence. She went to the local pet store where two female parrots were in a cage and for sale. She explained the situation and the store owner advised her that these parrots were from a tavern in the local port and their vocabulary was a little on the salty side. She decided to purchase them anyway, took them home and without fail they started cursing up a blue streak. Later that day, Father McMullen stopped by to look in on her and was shocked at what he was hearing. He related that he had two male parrots that were very devout, prayed the bible and said the rosary every day. He told her maybe if he took her parrots and put them in with his, they would get a better vocabulary and rid themselves of their foul language habit. He takes the cage back to the rectory and his two parrots, Moses and Jerramiah are in the cage, Moses has a miniature bible in his feet, turning the pages and reading passages and Jerramiah is going through the beads on his rosary saying Hail Marys and Our Fathers.
Father opens the cage and puts the two female parrots in with his. One of them blurts out "Hi boys.
We're a couple of wild women and we like whiskey in our water and getting naked and ****** all night long". Moses drops the bible, looks at Jerramiah and says "Jerry, throw away those rosary beads. Our prayers have been answered".
Black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and walks up to the bar. Bartender looks at the parrot and says, man that's pretty cool, where did you get it from. The parrot says, africa there's millions of them.
 
Should hear what Australians think of the USA president and vice president
Hint
Not good
No offence to the Americans intended

I subscribe to Sky News Australia.... I have a clue
 
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