Handguns for women

[Badjer]

It largely depends on the individual, but as multiple people here have already stated --Ruger SP101 double action in .357 with a grip activated laser sight. (If she does well with 38's she can try 357 or stay with .38) I have recommended this setup multiple times to at least be tried by the female shooter for the same reasons listed by others.

 

[Forrest Halley]

Let us know how your legal situations turn out when you explain why you engaged perpetrator(s) at 100 yards. At 30 yards, 90 feet, courts deem a rational person is far enough away to remove themself to a safe area, away from any PERCEIVED threat Most courts recognize 20-30 feet as the max threat limit for a person to engage deadly force against a life endangering threat. Then there's the collateral injury, death to innocent bystanders and damage to property.

I can make a shot at 100 yards with a j frame. This says nothing of my intent to do so unnecessarily. Fort Hood showed the need for long range ability. You make no account for a bad actor armed with a rifle or one of these 5.7's or AR "pistols". What case law do you have to support your hypothesis about innocent bystanders, over penetration, and property damage?

There are small frame revolvers well suited for people with small hands: ie S&W Lady Smith, S&W Model DA 36, Ruger LCR, etc., etc.

Suited to people with small hands or just marketed toward them? What exactly is a S&W Model DA 36? I couldn't find it in the catalog. The Lady Smith is no more polished or tuned internally than any other production model. I thought perhaps you'd name a rim fire model like the 43C and say it has a nicer trigger which is not possible due to the increased spring tension required to reliably ignite rimfire cartridges. You may get a tad nicer trigger pull on the 340PD due to the titanium cylinder, but beyond that these guns need professional gunsmithing to be smooth and reliable for a user requiring a lighter trigger in them. Nothing like that is coming from the factory. Not even performance center guns.

Speedloaders make reloading double action revolvers quick and easy. Since in most normal situations 1 to 3 rounds would be sufficient to repell home invader(s), would be assailant(s).

What kind of speed loaders do you recommend? HKS? Safariland Comp 1? SL Variant? Jet Loaders? Dade Machine?
That first one was a joke. Reloading a snub nose revolver quick and easy? No sir. Five second reload is neither quick nor easy. The short ejector rod in the j frame sized snubbies makes reliable extraction and reloading difficult unless the gun is swap hand reloaded with a very vertical orientation and a sharp strike to the rod. This minimizes the chance for partial extraction and catching a spent shell under the extractor star. Don't forget to ensure grip compatibility with the speed loaders. The most reliable setup is a moon clip for the first cylinder for certain extraction and realizing with either safariland or so variant speed loaders.
In a j frame 1-3 rounds is 20-60% of your available ammunition.

This is true of any firearm. Revolvers are less likely to have a problem.

Sand and dirt affect a revolver much more that a semiautomatic and the latter is much easier for the novice user to maintain. Look into the late Louis Awerbuck and his opinion on revolver reliability.

If a person doesn't have required dexterity and hand strength to handle a revolver they are more likely not able to work the slide on an automatic. A revolver is much easier to use than an automatic.

If a person can be taught to load and fire a revolver using speed loaders, they can be taught to load and fire a striker based semiautomatic pistol more effectively given the same training time. No matter what you do, you're not going to wrong accuracy out of a snubnose with a new or undedicated user. The trigger pull, the short sight radius and the grips which are minimal for the purpose of concealment all equate to lackluster marksmanship.

LOL. It's called Personal Defense as in repelling simple home invader(s), assailant(s); Not going on the Offense taking on a mob, chasing down heavily armed gangs.

You have forgotten the late Lt. Dwain Williams, a retired Chicago Firefighter who was killed in a carjacking after his j frame let him down against multiple assailants. His ammunition supply dwindling and in the verge of being surrounded he pressed the attack and was mortally wounded by a fleeing assailant. I don't get to choose my adventure completely. The bad guy(s) also get a say sometimes.

I'm a revolver guy and I'm pretty good with one. I've competed in idpa, USPSA, icore, and sass. I've carried them, hunted with them and trained with them a lot. It's great equipment, but it's suboptimal for my own self defense and just plain wrong for beginner self defense and it's dead wrong as a default for women. My wife is not particularly capable with handguns and she has competed with semiautomatics and revolvers. It's easier for her to use her Glock 26 than a snubnose or a single action. Cold hard facts. She's more effective under pressure with the semiautomatic. I want her to have the best chance at surviving not some oversold false sense of security failing her in time of need.

 

[West_Texas_Bull_Shooter]

I agree with Hill Country 63 to a point. I made the mistake of letting my wife buy the first two guns she wanted. And she did have great selection, "Because they were Pretty". The first was a Colt Python we paid $450.00 for in 1980. I thought she might be able to handle 38 Specials in it. That was a big mistake. She only weights about 120 and it was a wrestling match every time we went to the range. The she selected Belgium mad Browning High-Power in 9mm. The slide-action jumping around in her hand was uncomfortable. I finally bought her a SIG230 in 380 ACP. She does pretty well with this one. The only problem is she occasionally Limp-Wrist it and causes a jam. She knows immediately what she has done, chambers another round, and keeps shooting.
She has done well enough that I bought each of my two daughters a SIG230 when they left for college. They shot pretty well, too.

 

[Forrest Halley]

I agree with Hill Country 63 to a point. I made the mistake of letting my wife buy the first two guns she wanted. And she did have great selection, "Because they were Pretty". The first was a Colt Python we paid $450.00 for in 1980. I thought she might be able to handle 38 Specials in it. That was a big mistake. She only weights about 120 and it was a wrestling match every time we went to the range. The she selected Belgium mad Browning High-Power in 9mm. The slide-action jumping around in her hand was uncomfortable. I finally bought her a SIG230 in 380 ACP. She does pretty well with this one. The only problem is she occasionally Limp-Wrist it and causes a jam. She knows immediately what she has done, chambers another round, and keeps shooting.
She has done well enough that I bought each of my two daughters a SIG230 when they left for college. They shot pretty well, too.

The Sig P230 is essentially an upscaled Walther PPK and as such a very accurate handgun. Have them try a Glock 19 or S&W M&P 9 sometime. They'll shoot even better.

 

[Ridge Runner]

I can make a shot at 100 yards with a j frame. This says nothing of my intent to do so unnecessarily. Fort Hood showed the need for long range ability. You make no account for a bad actor armed with a rifle or one of these 5.7's or AR "pistols".

It blows my mine that you have such an assine concept that you even remotely think the average person should use a handgun to engage a threat with a rifle at long range.

What case law do you have to support your hypothesis about innocent bystanders, over penetration, and property damage?

Not hypothesis! Facts! I grew up in a long lineage of military and law enforcement family that led me to a military and law enforcement in Ohio. Later working with other law enforcement officers in North Carolina, Florida, and Tennessee.

There are multiple cases involving questionable shootings in which the defendant claimed they felt threatened and in fear for their life, in which they fatally, or severely wounded the assumed assailant over 20 yards - 60 feet away. All it takes is a Google search to find any specific or multiple news articles.

More than a few judges and juries ruled the would be victim/ defendant /shooter had time to flee, retreat to a safe area, back away, etc, etc. The respective would be victim/ defendant/ shooter was charged, and tried for,: aggravated assault, public endangerment, assault with a deadly weapon, public endangerment, shooting into a resident, destruction of property, attempted murder, murder, manslaughter, involuntary manslaughter, etc, etc. and some cases included various civil suit charges.

One particular case in Ohio. The homeowner shot and only wounded a perpetrator breaking into his house. The thief claimed he thought he was breaking into his own house. The thief sued the homeowner and won.

Here recently in Tennessee law enforcement officer shot her apartment building neighbor. She claimed she thought she was entering her apartment, claimed she was shooting a thief. She's in jail.

Armed felon attempt to rob a legally armed victim. Would be thief's automatic handgun failed to fire. Started to flee when the would be victim drew his firearm. The would be victim discharged 3 rounds missing the fleeing felon. Two of the bullets penetrated a residence nearly injuring the occupence. Both felon and potential robbery victim were arrested and charged on multiple felonies.

Suited to people with small hands or just marketed toward them? What exactly is a S&W Model DA 36? I couldn't find it in the catalog. The Lady Smith is no more polished or tuned internally than any other production model. I thought perhaps you'd name a rim fire model like the 43C and say it has a nicer trigger which is not possible due to the increased spring tension required to reliably ignite rimfire cartridges. You may get a tad nicer trigger pull on the 340PD due to the titanium cylinder, but beyond that these guns need professional gunsmithing to be smooth and reliable for a user requiring a lighter trigger in them. Nothing like that is coming from the factory. Not even performance center guns.

Took me all of 30 seconds to find S&W Model 36, aka Chief Special, and DA/SA 38 Special. Google search: Smith and Wesson model 36 38 caliber revolver.

What kind of speed loaders do you recommend? HKS? Safariland Comp 1? SL Variant? Jet Loaders? Dade Machine?

I use and recommend HKS for my .44 mag and .357 mag.

That first one was a joke. Reloading a snub nose revolver quick and easy? No sir. Five second reload is neither quick nor easy. The short ejector rod in the j frame sized snubbies makes reliable extraction and reloading difficult unless the gun is swap hand reloaded with a very vertical orientation and a sharp strike to the rod. This minimizes the chance for partial extraction and catching a spent shell under the extractor star. Don't forget to ensure grip compatibility with the speed loaders. The most reliable setup is a moon clip for the first cylinder for certain extraction and realizing with either safariland or so variant speed loaders.
In a j frame 1-3 rounds is 20-60% of your available ammunition. Sand and dirt affect a revolver much more that a semiautomatic and the latter is much easier for the novice user to maintain.

If a person can be taught to load and fire a revolver using speed loaders, they can be taught to load and fire a striker based semiautomatic pistol more effectively given the same training time. No matter what you do, you're not going to wrong accuracy out of a snubnose with a new or undedicated user. The trigger pull, the short sight radius and the grips which are minimal for the purpose of concealment all equate to lackluster marksmanship.

I'm a revolver guy and I'm pretty good with one. I've competed in idpa, USPSA, icore, and sass. I've carried them, hunted with them and trained with them a lot. It's great equipment, but it's suboptimal for my own self defense and just plain wrong for beginner self defense and it's dead wrong as a default for women. My wife is not particularly capable with handguns and she has competed with semiautomatics and revolvers. It's easier for her to use her Glock 26 than a snubnose or a single action. Cold hard facts. She's more effective under pressure with the semiautomatic. I want her to have the best chance at surviving not some oversold false sense of security failing her in time of need.

Utterly pure BS on your part. You obviously have little to no clue about revolvers, or what you are talking about.

I will agree that shooting a double action revolver by pulling the trigger to shoot it is less accurate than shooting a double action revolver as a single action due to trigger weight differences. However, the same can be said for shooting double action automatics in the same matter.

I use a fully customized Para Ordinance 1911 45 ACP double stack, mag capacities: 10 to 15 rounds. In conjuction with my EDC/PD revolvers.

You have forgotten the late Lt. Dwain Williams, a retired Chicago Firefighter who was killed in a carjacking after his j frame let him down against multiple assailants. His ammunition supply dwindling and in the verge of being surrounded he pressed the attack and was mortally wounded by a fleeing assailant. I don't get to choose my adventure completely. The bad guy(s) also get a say sometimes.

May he Rest In Peace. With all do respect to him and his family, I have never heard of him or the incident.

His J frame didn't let him down his lack of range time caught up with him if he didn't hit any of his assailants.

As for him be fatally wounded by a fleeing assailant, the fleeing assailant was most likely spraying rounds and it was by coincidence the assailant hit the retired fire fighter.

 

[rafter3]

My wife likes the Glock 19 9mm, great capacity and size

 

[Forrest Halley]

It blows my mine that you have such an assine concept that you even remotely think the average person should use a handgun to engage a threat with a rifle at long range.

It's training for capability. If I can make hits at a hundred yards I can make surgical hits at closer distances. It was a statement of MY capability which you have blown out of proportion because you have been called out for recommending the snub-nosed revolver to people it doesn't serve well at all.

Not hypothesis! Facts! [Snip]

You have provided a CV of law enforcement and military experience when I asked for case law to support your position.

There are multiple cases involving questionable shootings in which the defendant claimed they felt threatened and in fear for their life, in which they fatally, or severely wounded the assumed assailant over 20 yards - 60 feet away. All it takes is a Google search to find any specific or multiple news articles.

That may be relevant to folks that are unarmed or armed with an impact or melee weapon, but gun vs. gun the distance does not apply. MOI must be established for deadly force, but they don't magically get good boy points for being 65 feet away.

More than a few judges and juries ruled the would be victim/ defendant /shooter had time to flee, retreat to a safe area, back away, etc, etc. The respective would be victim/ defendant/ shooter was charged, and tried for,: aggravated assault, public endangerment, assault with a deadly weapon, public endangerment, shooting into a resident, destruction of property, attempted murder, murder, manslaughter, involuntary manslaughter, etc, etc. and some cases included various civil suit charges.

One particular case in Ohio. The homeowner shot and only wounded a perpetrator breaking into his house. The thief claimed he thought he was breaking into his own house. The thief sued the homeowner and won.

Here recently in Tennessee law enforcement officer shot her apartment building neighbor. She claimed she thought she was entering her apartment, claimed she was shooting a thief. She's in jail.

Armed felon attempt to rob a legally armed victim. Would be thief's automatic handgun failed to fire. Started to flee when the would be victim drew his firearm. The would be victim discharged 3 rounds missing the fleeing felon. Two of the bullets penetrated a residence nearly injuring the occupence. Both felon and potential robbery victim were arrested and charged on multiple felonies.

We were looking for over penetration, innocent bystanders, and property damage cases. We got a lot of anecdotes.

Took me all of 30 seconds to find S&W Model 36, aka Chief Special, and DA/SA 38 Special. Google search: Smith and Wesson model 36 38 caliber revolver.

You said "Smith and Wesson Model DA 36". The reality is there is no such thing. There is a Model 36 which is a steel framed double action revolver. I have a few. You're claiming to be an expert and you misquote model numbers and names. The use of proper terminology is the hallmark of professionalism and expertise. You might as well be saying "slap a clip in it" when referring to seating a magazine.

I use and recommend HKS for my .44 mag and .357 mag.

This right here tells me everything I need to know about your level of expertise with revolvers. Second rate ammunition holders being recommended from a soapbox.

Utterly pure BS on your part. You obviously have little to no clue about revolvers, or what you are talking about.

You sound like such an expert on all things revolver. I'd like to get together and shoot revolvers sometime. We'd find out in short order who knows what they're talking about and who's been selling snake oil for quite some time.

I will agree that shooting a double action revolver by pulling the trigger to shoot it is less accurate than shooting a double action revolver as a single action due to trigger weight differences. However, the same can be said for shooting double action automatics in the same matter.

We will not agree here. I never said anything about single action or double action and accuracy. I don't generally use the single action function unless I am shooting at distances in excess of fifteen yards or with my X frame revolvers because I feel the double action is hard on the cylinder stops and notches due to the increased mass of the cylinder. That's probably just me being foolish because as you previously stated I have little to no clue about revolvers.

I use a fully customized Para Ordinance 1911 45 ACP double stack, mag capacities: 10 to 15 rounds. In conjuction with my EDC/PD revolvers.

Fully customized for reliability. Who did the work? A P14-45, P12-45, or a P10-45? Tell me its not an LDA or a power extractor...that would just be amazing. Sounds like you might have some of those clunky post ban ten round mags that are half metal and half plastic. By 15 rounds I presume you mean 14+1. Since you're an HKS speed loader guy, I put it well past you to find any kind of magazine extensions. Yes, I know all about Para Ordnance too.

May he Rest In Peace. With all do respect to him and his family, I have never heard of him or the incident.

His J frame didn't let him down his lack of range time caught up with him if he didn't hit any of his assailants.

As for him be fatally wounded by a fleeing assailant, the fleeing assailant was most likely spraying rounds and it was by coincidence the assailant hit the retired fire fighter.

You had all you needed to research the case and yet you came back with just gun counter suppositions? Well I guess that's to be expected from a person who has been deceiving others about the capabilities of the j frame revolver for some time.

 

[steve white]

Everybody...breathe

 

[Wyatt Smith]

@Forrest Halley what speed loaders do you recommend? I’ve only used HKS, but admittedly that’s due to availability at the LGS. They don’t seem to keep the cartridges very secure.

 

[Tanks]

I had my partner train with an Aegis instructor for a week (36 hours and several hundred rounds). She became very comfortable with an HK VP9 in 9mm. It cost me, but there was no way I could instruct her without her becoming defensive.

 

[dhughes66]

I started my wife on a Smith & Wesson Shield EZ .380acp. I would highly recommend that pistol for a female who has not shot a lot. It is large enough to actually handle and learn proper technique. I would also strongly recommend that you let a professional train her. Just because you are a good shooter does not mean you are a good instructor. My wife and I actually really enjoy taking classes together. After becoming comfortable with the S&W EZ .380acp, she graduated to a Glock G48. Just my experience in getting my wife more into shooting. It worked well for her.

 

[Hififile324]

Mieke,
I am a long-time female firearms instructor. I also provide other firearms research, education, and discussion services in my community. I have taught many ladies in my classes; I have yet to teach ladies-only classes. Any issues one may find operating a firearm can be identified for both men and women. At the end of my writing, I’ve listed links to the products I discuss here.

I will provide basic suggestions for a start point. Feel free to ask for further information.

1) If you are asking the question of which caliber to purchase, take a basic firearms class from a reputable, well-known instructor in your area before you purchase a gun. Make sure they have firearms in the calibers you are interested in for you to try. Make sure they are willing to spend extra time with you or meet with you after class. Talk to them about your concerns before you sign up for the class. Shots taken for defensive accuracy with a .380, a 9mm or .38 special will stop a human threat. It is up to you to learn to take the accurate shots; the caliber or gun can’t do that for you. With the right gun and training, you can likely handle any of those three calibers effectively.

2) If you are starting your search for either a .380 or 9mm, please look carefully at the SIG SAUER Rose. I own the entire P365 line with the exception of the .380, including the X-MACRO and additionally a Wilson Combat version of one of the P365s. I own two Roses, the original P365 nitron, and the XL. (The 9mm Rose is an XL model with the comp slits added to mitigate felt recoil.) (I also have a .380 in the S&W M&P Shield E-Z slide, as well as their .9mm, two other popular handguns you could consider. I also agree with posters that the Glock 43 is a good choice, as well as some of the CZ P-10 models.)

SIG is the only company I know of that has made a 100% commitment to the female shooter. This isn’t just something advertised as a gun designed to fit a smaller hand, as most manufacturers say ergonomically, but a full commitment to its Rose line and ongoing education.

The spokesperson for the Rose is Lena Miculek. I’ll let you do your homework. She is Jerry Miculek’s daughter and a top shooter in her own right. SIG supports Lena in offering online education. Their SIG instructors travel the United States, with Lena and team giving workshops and training. Find a class scheduled in your area and learn from some of the best before you purchase a gun.

Sig also sponsors the SIG SAUER Rose Community on Facebook. I have provided a link below. There are currently over 17K members. It is ladies-only and a welcoming place where you will get answers; sometimes, Lena Miculek chimes in, too.

3) Will you want an optic right away, or do you think you will want one in the future—or a laser? If you think you will want or need an RMR, you need to decide that upfront so you can purchase your semi with a slide cut for the optic. That might determine what RMR you will mount, as I’d advise staying away from plate adapters. If your slide is not pre-cut, you would have to send it out to be milled or purchase a pre-cut one. Most semis these days do come cut for optics.

If you will use a RMR, please read “Red Dot Mastery” by Mike Ochsner and Aaron Cowan’s white paper at his website at SageDynamics. There is no point in having an optic if we don’t understand how our eyes capture a scene and how our brain visualizes what our eyes capture, and how our body reacts when we anticipate a move. Cowan’s white paper covers much of this, as does Ochsner’s book. Ochsner is a neurology-based firearms instructor. Also consider taking a “red dot transition” class in your local area—again, seek out a knowledgeable instructor. If you can find one with a law enforcement background who provides current training not only to their peers but also to the public, that would be a good choice.

For carry-size revolvers, your choice would be a laser. For years, I carried a Ruger SP101. I have a 4”, a 3”, and a 2.5”. If you choose a revolver, one of those would be my choice. These are chambered in .357 magnum, and you can chamber .38 special in them. Please buy a revolver with a visible hammer--not a shrouded or internal hammer, or you will not be able to shoot in single action. (S&W and Colt both have excellent short barrel revolvers, but they will be more expensive.)

3) Are you going to carry on or off your body? Think about that before you make a purchase. Understand how you will carry. You need to do a self-assessment. What you wear, where you go, your abilities, and your body shape. (Take a concealed carry class in your location to understand the laws of what you can and cannot do.)

For on-body carry, I suggest the Enigma Holsters for ladies and many men. Phlster Holsters not only designed the Enigma from a physical aspect but is now providing online conference classes to help users customize their holster rigs to their body type and activity. Get on their email list. The Enigma holster group is another company dedicated to making sure we completely understand the proper use of their product—that goes beyond initial sales.

I have three Enigma Holster rigs, one each for my different size SIG P365s.

Off-body carry, I suggest Zendira purses. There are no zippers to open the concealed compartments. They use a magnetic approach. I have three of these in different styles. The Friday collection is perfect for me. Leather is top quality, execution is flawless. Some models come with trigger guard holsters, but you can add a Velcro sticky back holster to your order. I am not a fan of trigger guard holsters anywhere except on a belt. The re-holstering activity can be unsafe if the trigger guard holster is on a lanyard in a compartment. I also purchase my flat sticky back P365 model holsters from both SIG SAUER and Crossbreed, but if you purchase a different model gun, Crossbreed likely makes one for that model.

I am going to stop here. Again, if you have questions, please ask on this forum. I also have Glocks, other SIG handguns, and other brand models that I own or have tried and feel confident in recommending (or not). But you have to start somewhere.

SIG supports a range rental program, and I believe Glock may, too. If you have a rental range in your area, they may have the models and calibers you want to try out.

My point in taking the time to write all this out is that what you purchase fits into a “system”—a system of how you will operate and use your gun within your capabilities. If you purchase a “caliber” or a “model” of gun based on a caliber, you may fall short of the other considerations you will need to be accurate, self-assured, carry your gun comfortably, and enjoy practicing.

Laura (see below for links)

Enigma Holsters: https://www.phlsterholsters.com (check links/videos under “Learn)

Red Dot Mastery: https://tinyurl.com/58ukw53b (he also has a website)

Sage Dynamics/Aaron Cowan: https://www.sagedynamics.org/ (scroll down for white paper)

Sig Sauer Rose: https://www.sigsauer.com/p365-xl-comp-rose.html https://www.sigsauer.com/p365-rose-xl-comp.html

https://www.sigsauer.com/p365-380-rose.html

https://www.sigsauer.com/rose.html

Sig Academy: https://sigsaueracademy.com/ (look under courses and experience)

Sig Sauer Rose Facebook Page (17+K members): https://www.facebook.com/groups/rosecommunitysigsauer/

Zendira Handbags: https://zendira.com/

Crossbreed Holsters: https://www.crossbreedholsters.com

S&W M&P Shield EZ slide guns: https://www.smith-wesson.com/products/shield-ez

CZ P-10 series: https://cz-usa.com/cz-p-10-series/

Great post Laura, excellent guidance!!

 

[Ray B]

Not to get in an argument- but, years ago I could carry whatever handgun I wanted provided it met two criteria: 1. I had to qualify with it and 2. I had to be able to be concealed. I ordered two revolvers- this was 1980 before the Glock revolution, two S&Ws a 60 and a 66. I traded the 60 off for a Win M70 (30-06 1962) and kept the 66. Both were accurate enough- the 66 was larger so had a longer sight radius so the practical accuracy was more. Since the topic is guns for people with small hands, I suppose the Chief Special would work, but for me the little round grip needed some big rubber grips to control the gun. More recently my son got a handgun, primarily for home defense by his wife. She selected a S&W Shield 9mm in preference to any revolver, including my favored 66s and Pythons. As noted, she has had professional instruction, legal training and shoots often enough to have sufficient muscle memory to utilize the gun in event that a situation that tests her abilities occurs.

 

[dchamp]

I think one of the first questions that needs answering is how enthusiastic is your wife in learning and using a defensive handgun. If she doesn’t want to then forget it. But if she wants to then, in my opinion, find her an introductory handgun class for the basics like safety and functionality and where she can try various handguns.

The next step would be to:
1. Find her a good quality handgun that fits her hands, whether revolver or self-loader it does not matter. I think fit is more important than type for the beginner. She needs to be able to grip the stocks with both hands and no gap between the thumbs.
2. Purchase all the accouterments to go with that handgun, holster, mag holder for self-loaders, strips or speed loaders for revolvers and a good belt. Women’s holsters are, in general different than mens. It’s all about their hips. Also, OWB holsters are easier to start with.
3. Depending on her strength and familiarity, I think I would start her on a smaller caliber, say .22 to 9mm/38spl. What ever she would be comfortable with while learning and developing her skills and mitigating recoil control and developing her trigger press. It is easier to go up in caliber once comfortable and learned than out of gate from the get go.
4. DO NOT TRY TO TEACH HER YOURSELF!!! YOU WILL REGRET THAT. Send her off, WITHOUT YOU, to train with a professional. Have her take a friend or family member if she likes. Remember this is all about her.

I use to help instruct defensive handgun classes. We offered twelve week, two hour class sessions once a week. That gave students a week of dry practice and range time to practice what they had learn in class. I think the time frame worked well.

Good luck
Take it for what it's worth or not, these are just my opinions

 

[barryk]

I teach a Female Firearms/Self Defense class once a month and after over 20 years of doing so I’ll offer these observations. As a general rule, females have much less grip strength than men and as such a revolver with a double action trigger pull is difficult. Also, because of less arm strength, manual cycling of semi autos can also be problematic. As an husband don’t pick it for her and tell her this is what she needs to carry. Under no circumstances allow the average gun store counter help to make any recommendations as to what she should purchase/carry…..they don’t have a clue. (That’s a rabbit hole for another day). With the above caveats, assemble your own selection or take her to a range where she can fire a selection for herself and let her help make her own choice. I have ladies every month show up with something that doesn’t work for them and hear all the stories about how they were pressured by a sales guy or husband etc and the pistol doesn’t fit, can’t pull trigger, etc.. I would rather have a lady with a 380 that they can shoot well stoked with good ammo than a 9/38 that doesn’t work. As a general rule if they can handle it let them shoot what works.

Nothing for nothing, my wife fits into the grip/arm strength issues above and what she selected for her daily carry is a Glock 43 9mm with a TLR6 light. She shoots it well and can function it without issues. Just my .02.

I agree with Hillcountry 63 and have taught Kansas Concealed Carry since we started it in 2006. We also teach some Women's Basic Handgun classes. If a woman can have confidence in her firearm, that is the most important thing to me.....if she can shoot it well, often, field strip and clean often, she gains that confidence. I agree the double action pull of a revolver doesn't work well for many females. Racking the slide is also difficult for many older women that may have arthritis problems. I know I'll have many who disagree, but if she can find a lite rack like the Ruger LCPII to start with....she can have fun with it an develop confidence. I think 380 is a good choice also but have found the lighter guns in .380 are to "snappy" for them. Two key points Hillcountry makes, don't pick one for her and don't let a most gun store owners pressure sell her one. Glocks are an excellent choice, eat anything, and are pretty much malfunction free if they maintain a firm grip so the slide can operate properly. I carry and like the Sig Sauer P365 but that is a compact with a short sight radius and most women handle a handgun with a little more weight and a little more distance between sights. Hillcountry gives good advice.....let her try several and settle for something that suits her.