on a lighter note...

IMG_3759.PNG
 
motherinlaw.png
 
A58D7B2D-0F93-4592-A641-FE9CC54807E6.jpeg
 
AN ELDERLY COUPLE LEARNED TO SEND TEXT MESSAGES ON THEIR MOBILE PHONES.

THE WIFE, A RETIRED COLLEGE ENGLISH INSTRUCTOR WITH EMPHASIS ON THE CLASSICS, WAS AN UNAPOLOGETIC ROMANTIC; HER HUSBAND, A RETIRED SALTY NAVY CHIEF PETTY OFFICER OF THIRTY YEARS' SERVICE, WAS A NO-NONSENSE GUY.

ONE AFTERNOON THE WIFE WENT TO THE LOCAL STARBUCKS TO MEET A FRIEND FOR COFFEE. WHILE AWAITING HER FRIEND'S ARRIVAL, SHE EXERCISED HER NEW SKILL BY SENDING HER HUSBAND A ROMANTIC TEXT MESSAGE:

"IF YOU ARE SLEEPING, SEND ME YOUR DREAMS. IF YOU ARE LAUGHING, SEND ME YOUR SMILE. IF YOU ARE EATING, SEND ME A BITE. IF YOU ARE DRINKING, SEND ME A SIP. IF YOU ARE CRYING, SEND ME YOUR TEARS. I LOVE YOU."

THE HUSBAND RESPONDED: "I'M TAKIN' A SHIT. PLEASE ADVISE."

ALMOST BRINGS A TEAR TO MY EYES
 
With all due respect to our barrister members. :D

An oldie but a goodie!
A rabbi, a Hindu, and a lawyer are in a car. They run out of gas, and are forced to stop at a farmer's house. The farmer says that there are only 2 extra beds, and one person will have to sleep in the barn.
The Hindu says, "I'm humble, I'll sleep in the barn," so he goes out to the barn. In a few minutes, the farmer hears a knock on the door. It's the Hindu and he says, "There is a cow in the barn. It's against my beliefs to sleep with a cow."
So the rabbi says, "I'm humble, I'll sleep in the barn." A few minutes later, the farmer hears another knock on the door and it's the rabbi. He says that it is against his beliefs to sleep where there is a pig and there is a pig in the barn.
So the lawyer is forced to sleep in the barn. A few minutes later, there is a knock on the door. It's the pig and the cow.
 
Now that is a perfect use for wolves!
 

Forum statistics

Threads
65,889
Messages
1,455,905
Members
138,620
Latest member
KassieWhal
 

 

 

Latest profile posts

NEW ZEALAND SAFARIS wrote on Rare Breed's profile.
3 attending thanks
Elegant Floral Perfume for Women in UAE at futurestyleperfumes celebrates femininity with beautifully blended soft floral notes and delicate accents that feel fresh, graceful, and timeless. Designed for women who love refined, long‑lasting fragrances.
WILD HUNTING SPAIN wrote on Rare Breed's profile.
Hey, me Pablo and one of my guides Claudio, will attend the dinner, see you on Friday.
NYAMAZANA SAFARIS wrote on Rare Breed's profile.
Hi my wife Jenn and I hope to attend both AH dinners . Thanks Wayne Van Den Bergh
steve white wrote on ftothfadd's profile.
I will take the Tikka rings and scope cover, if not spoken for...
 
Top