on a lighter note...

A man was telling his buddy: "You won't believe what happened last night. My daughter walked into the living room and said: 'Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, forget my college tuition loan, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out the window, take my TV and my laptop. Please take any of my jewelry to the Salvation Army or Cash Converters. Then sell my car, take my front door key away, and throw me out of the house. Then disown me and never talk to me again. And don't forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to any charity you choose."
"Holy Smokes," replied the friend, "she actually said that?"

"Well, she didn't put it quite like that. Her exact words were:”
"Dad, meet my new boyfriend, Mohammed. We're going to work together on Bernie Sander’s presidential campaign.’”

 

THAT is funny.

 

Ain't that the truth.

 

Was just in Walmart. I felt like I just entered into an episode of the Walking Dead. The tweaker Chick that tried hitting me up for money in the parking lot looked like a Zombie.

 

The panhandlers at my local Walmart in Maryland have gone to Maine for the summer. Only the working stiffs are still here.

 

They don't like it when I tell them to spend less time scamming parking lots, and more time looking for a job.

 

Did you get her phone number?

 

I often think of taking those people a few block down the street to Work One. Apply today, work tomorrow! I don't think you even need a home address....

 

There is not a big enough set of Beer goggles to make that happen.

 

I've asked them if they needed a job, I had one, splitting and stacking wood. They all have bad backs.

 

So weird