Assets Versus Experiences

I was always gone months at a time, so everything I had went into the family; all money when I was gone, all my time and attention when I was home. I didn't begin accumulating anything until my kids were on their own and settled. What a return on my "investment" though.....
 
I had one of the best times of my life last Monday with my daughter and her family at Disneyland. We had a guide (well worth the cost) that set up each ride so no waits.

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Because of the guide we had a full day. Loved seeing my granddaughters enjoy it so much.

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@Tanks
Despite the cost the memory the memories will last a lifetime. For more valuable.
Bob
 
I had one of the best times of my life last Monday with my daughter and her family at Disneyland. We had a guide (well worth the cost) that set up each ride so no waits.

View attachment 756529

Because of the guide we had a full day. Loved seeing my granddaughters enjoy it so much.

View attachment 756530
Ok, what does the guide cost and how do you arrange that?
 
$700 for the day, tickets have to have lightning lane on them. Word of mouth, basically from parents of my granddaughters' schoolmates.
That's a good price, I've heard of people paying much more. Some of them are pretty high end, like limo ride from the hotel, include swag etc.
 
Ok, what does the guide cost and how do you arrange that?
If it’s during crowded times or if you can’t go whenever you want it’s worth it universal and island of adventure have it also. I take my boys down to Orlando multiple times a year and the tours are nice because they take you behind the scenes or give you inside knowledge of the rides or shows that you wouldn’t know otherwise.
 
Thank you for that heartfelt encouragement. I will certainly consider it.

Most (but not all) of my fortune was not earned. No one wants to get rich that way: life insurance and fatal MVA litigation re my wife's death. Yes, I suffered and continue to suffer. Several times a week, sometimes a day, I see her in my dreams. It almost always ends the same with me begging her to come home (she was away visiting her family when the accident happened). Though I pay with suffering, it's not money I earned. I have decided to live off my pensions and interest from investments, and I'm living very satisfactorily. I help my family out financially when needed and frequently fund special things for them. Last year she took her husband to Vegas for an Oilers' game for his birthday. This year she will take my grandson to Toronto to watch the Jays. He wants me to go with them but I just cannot deal with those crowds. Anyway I am careful to be a part of the family but not running the show.

My daughter and grandkids have inherited my wife's genetic mutation and it's already affecting them. It took out my 14 year-old son ten months before the accident took her. In fact, if I hadn't just got out of the hospital from another breakdown and unable to travel, it would have been me in the front seat of the car not her. And if that had been the case, she would do exactly what I'm doing: looking after her family with the blood money.

I expect you would do the same?

As far as rounding up some poor unknown victim from the forum to share in an Alaskan fishing adventure: I'm a complicated person and I know it. For one thing, I don't know when to stop. I have an unusual capacity to burn the candle at both ends, sometimes for days on end. That can be very annoying for others. Only one person I know can put up with it: my brother. And he is by all accounts a truly remarkable person. One in a million. But he's 75 now and lived with diabetes for fifty years. He is in good shape all things considered and I would love for him to experience the wilds of Alaska with me but it's just too risky. Being off grid with diabetes is asking for trouble.

So ... my life is complicated because I am complicated. Cause or effect is debatable but it is what it is.
Why not take your family to Africa with you and watch your daughter, grandson, and son in law hunt or take them fishing in Alaska. You could also take your brother to Africa
 
Why not take your family to Africa with you and watch your daughter, grandson, and son in law hunt or take them fishing in Alaska. You could also take your brother to Africa
I have offered to take my brother. Many times. He's declined. I suspect he doesn't want me spending that much money on him. Also, the trip itself would be tough on him. As any of you who are diabetic know, it's important to "stay on schedule" with that condition. Schedules are meaningless to me. I often go thirty hours without sleeping, especially during hunting season. When I was finishing my PhD thesis to meet deadline, I was starting my seventh day without sleep when my retina detached again for the third time. When my brother and I hunt together in Montana he often gets in trouble with his blood sugar even though he now has the most sophisticated injection equipment available. And he doesn't try to keep up with me. Last year he also had trouble with his feet that cancelled his ability to stalk. My daughter would love to go to Africa but her health is also not good due to MELAS condition she inherited from her mother. Not a great place to be if that shit acts up. And she has two little kids to consider. I am pretty much bullet proof. Always have been. But not everyone is so lucky. My grandson is approaching guns and hunting cautiously. That's good. If he decides to follow Papa's footsteps, I want it to be because what I do motivates him, not me trying to purposely motivate him (I.e. living vicariously through my grandson). The best guidance is living a good example, not imposing it on young people. That was how my dad did it. We will see how things play out with Parker. He's already shooting skeet with me and doing very well for a beginner. But he is approaching it reservedly, like all things. That's fine. He could EASILY be quite competitive. But that has to be his decision. Same with going to Africa. I will know when or if he's ready to go.
 
Why not take your family to Africa with you and watch your daughter, grandson, and son in law hunt or take them fishing in Alaska. You could also take your brother to Africa
@Mtn_Infantry
I would only take my brother to Africa for leopard bait.
When covid was in he said aren't you lucky, if I die you won't be able to come to my funeral.
I said to him who said I would go anyway. If I did I would pour a beer over your grave, but I would drink it first.
We don't get in at all he is just a pompous prick.
Bob
 
I always wonder "What will my kids think of me when I'm gone?"

Will it be "Dad was cool. He had a cool sportscar, boat, Rolex, high-end scotch collection, big house, etc."

Or will it be "Dad was a mountain. He hunted boars in the swamps of Georgia. Waterfowl on the freezing bays and creeks of NJ in the middle of winter. He went to Africa to hunt. He took a bear in NJ with a bow. He battled sea monsters 100 miles out in the ocean. And he took us all along for the ride and showed us how to do it."

I would like it to be the latter. There are only three people on this earth that I really do care what they think of me. My wife, and our two kids.

What other folks think is secondary but yes, the experiences matter so much more to me.

We do have a boat, and I have some other "nice" things, but riddle of the day the memories and making new ones are what keep me charging forward.
This is a thoughtful reflection on moving from building wealth and stability early in life to later realizing that experiences and meaning matter more than assets.
 
I always wonder "What will my kids think of me when I'm gone?"

Will it be "Dad was cool. He had a cool sportscar, boat, Rolex, high-end scotch collection, big house, etc."

Or will it be "Dad was a mountain. He hunted boars in the swamps of Georgia. Waterfowl on the freezing bays and creeks of NJ in the middle of winter. He went to Africa to hunt. He took a bear in NJ with a bow. He battled sea monsters 100 miles out in the ocean. And he took us all along for the ride and showed us how to do it."

I would like it to be the latter. There are only three people on this earth that I really do care what they think of me. My wife, and our two kids.

What other folks think is secondary but yes, the experiences matter so much more to me.

We do have a boat, and I have some other "nice" things, but the memories and making new ones are what keep me charging forward.
I’d be happy with them thinking: “my dad was a good guy”.
 
Just me I tell my kids to find and live their own dreams as I have. I exposed them to mine when they were young now it is up to them. When I pass each child will receive money not land or homes to emphasize my points to them. Live their own life not in my shadow as my father taught me
 

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