on a lighter note...

Squeal like a pig caught under a gate
Hard as a hookers heart
Whine like a broke dick dog
Guess I had a bad up bringing
 
Looks like a basket full of A holes with all the pretty ones picked out.
Looks like they got hit in the face with a fist full of chisels and they all stuck.
 
Fell out of the ugly tree, and hit every branch on the way down...

Hotter than a freshly f'd fox in a forest fire..
 
Don't amount to a pisshole in the snow.
Skin a turd for a nickel and ruin a dime knife doing it.
Don't amount to a fart in a skillet.
Balliky bare ass.
Tinkerfrig.
F**&ed up to a fair thee well.
 
Went over like a fart in church
Hornier than a two pecker billy goat
Ran like a spotted ass ape
 
Wouldn't make a pimple on a good (pick a trade or profession)'s ass.
 
CD4B1656-EDB6-44C4-9F53-357C386BA3F8.jpeg
 
All time favorite sayings, used quite often by me to the point of overuse:

How you hanging? Like a hair in a biscuit.

Hotter than a four balled Tomcat on a tin roof.

Slicker than snot on a door knob.

If it ain’t spiders, it’s piss ants.
 
117602042_981577275685548_9065522000757251798_n.jpg
 
1597327600442.jpeg
 
Happier than a sissy in Boystown

Dumb as Soup
 
South end of a north bound horse (a reference to a particular governor from Louisiana I believe)
 
Sweating like a one-legged man in an a$$ kicking contest.
 

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pajarito wrote on Altitude sickness's profile.
is the parker shotgun still available?
Waterbuck hunt from this past week!

JudyB wrote on Muting the Goat's profile.
Here's a photo of Tony receiving that Shaw & Hunter award at the 1970 annual EAPHA Dinner Dance. Tony Dyer, then EAPHA President and Princess (Sunny) von Auersperg presented it. I also attended the event.
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