on a lighter note...

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A letter to Dad

A father passing by his son’s bedroom was astonished to see

that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.


Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the

pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'


With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with

trembling hands and read the letter.


Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you.

I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to

avoid a scene with Mom and you.


I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her

piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that

she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion…

Dad she's pregnant.


Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of

firewood for the whole winter.


We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana

doesn’t really hurt anyone.


We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the

other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.


In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure

for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.


Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care

of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that

you can get to know your grandchildren.


Love, Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy’s

house. I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse

things in life than a lousy report card that's in my

desk drawer.


I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.

Tom
 
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