on a lighter note...

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Reminds me of a story by Bernie Lubbers, The Whiskey Professor, told about his elderly dad who was, to be honest, a functioning alcoholic. He had to take him to the doctor and the doc asked his dad how much he drank. Dad said a quart. The doc was confused and asked if this was per month or what. The dad responded, "No. That's per day."
I guess my great uncle Shelton was an alcoholic--when he was cremated, he burned for three days...
 
There was veteran at a doctor appointment. Him and a couple of other veterans, as with most other veterans, were complaining about how the various doctors always asked the same questions, from a form questionnaire.

On this particular visit his responses to this V.A. Primary Care doctor:

Doc:
Do you drink?

Vet:
Not any more; Not any less; since my last visit. But I did discover a better way.

Doc:
What do you drink; beer, wine liquor?

Vet:
All the about.

Doc:
What do you mean a better way?

Vet:
I mix the beer, wine, and liquor then use a funnel and hose.

Doc:
How much would you say you drink?

Vet:
6 a day.

Doc:
You Should cut down to 1 drink a day.

Vet:
I tried that but I couldn't get the mix right. 12 bottles of wine, 12 gallons of liquor, 1 keg of beer; 6 a day. One keg of mix doesn't last the morning.

Doc:
Speechless

Vet:
The shocked and dumbfounded look on the doc's face was hilarious.
 

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