on a lighter note...

Discussion in 'Humorous Jokes, Stories or Pictures' started by observe, Mar 28, 2013.

  1. observe

    observe AH ENABLER CONTRIBUTOR AH Legend

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    ???

    FB_IMG_1553274488312.jpg
     
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  2. Brent in Az

    Brent in Az SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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  3. ArmyGrunt

    ArmyGrunt AH Elite

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  4. Bullthrower338

    Bullthrower338 AH ENABLER AH Legend

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    That’s boudain on a bogie roll!
     
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  5. BWH

    BWH AH ENABLER AH Legend

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  6. K-man

    K-man AH Elite

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    This is a reprint, but just had to share

    Over 5000 years ago Moses said to the Israelites, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels. and I will lead you to the Promised Land."

    Nearly 75 years ago, when welfare was being introduced Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light a Camel, this is the Promised Land."

    Today, Congress has taken your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price of Camels, and mortgaged the Promised Land!

    Made me so depressed thinking about Health care, economy, savings, social security I called a suicide hotline. was told to press 1 for English. I was then connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal, they got excited and asked if I knew how to drive a truck or fly a plane....

    I think we are screwed...

    Thanks for letting me repost this ….
     
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  7. observe

    observe AH ENABLER CONTRIBUTOR AH Legend

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    54524210_2115397891887192_8462107311479980032_n.jpg
     
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  8. observe

    observe AH ENABLER CONTRIBUTOR AH Legend

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    53850256_2500386629990951_2346681246186209280_n.jpg
     
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  9. observe

    observe AH ENABLER CONTRIBUTOR AH Legend

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    54434649_285421452377437_7619623852594692096_n.jpg
     
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  10. observe

    observe AH ENABLER CONTRIBUTOR AH Legend

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    54396446_2380561438661602_159488293367447552_n.jpg
     
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  11. 375 Ruger Fan

    375 Ruger Fan AH ENABLER GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Docked In Chicago Harbor

    No matter who you are, the irony here is funny!

    upload_2019-3-23_4-44-34.png
     

  12. ArmyGrunt

    ArmyGrunt AH Elite

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  13. pretorius

    pretorius New Member

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  14. pretorius

    pretorius New Member

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  15. Bushpig4Ever

    Bushpig4Ever AH Enthusiast

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  16. Hogpatrol

    Hogpatrol AH ENABLER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Jack Daniels trick

    A woman goes to a counselor, worried about her husband's temper.
    The counselor asks, "What's the problem?

    The woman says, "I don't know what to do. Every day my husband loses
    his temper for no reason. It scares me."


    The Counselor says, "I have a cure for that. When it seems your husband
    is getting angry, take a double shot of Jack Daniel's and swish it in your mouth.
    Swish and swish, but don't swallow until he either leaves the room or calms down."


    Two weeks later, she goes back to the counselor, looking fresh and reborn.

    She tells the counselor, "That was a brilliant idea. Every time my husband started
    to get angry, I swished the Jack. I swished and swished, and he calmed down.

    How does swishing Jack Daniel's in your mouth do that?

    The counselor said, "The Jack Daniel's does nothing. Keeping your mouth shut is the trick."
     

  17. Hogpatrol

    Hogpatrol AH ENABLER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Last Nickel
    A father walks into a restaurant with his young son. He gives the young boy 3 nickels
    to play with to keep him occupied. Suddenly the boy starts choking, going blue in the face.

    The father realizes the boy has swallowed the nickels and starts slapping him on the back.
    The boy coughs up 2 of the nickels, but keeps choking. Looking at his son, the father is
    panicking, shouting for help.
    A well dressed, attractive, and serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting
    at a coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion,
    she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds the newspaper and places it on the
    counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant.
    Reaching the boy, the woman carefully drops his pants; takes hold of the boy's testicles
    and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly. After a few seconds
    the boy convulses violently and coughs up the last nickel, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.
    Releasing the boy's testicles, the woman hands the nickel to the father and walks back to her
    seat in the coffee bar without saying a word
    As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the
    woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before,
    it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?
    "No," the woman replied...."Divorce attorney.” {I also heard an IRS auditor can do the same thing}
     
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  18. Hogpatrol

    Hogpatrol AH ENABLER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    IMG_1638.jpg
     

  19. Hogpatrol

    Hogpatrol AH ENABLER SILVER SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    IMG_1625.jpg
     
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  20. Tom Hawk

    Tom Hawk AH Enthusiast

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    1597985E-7425-40E5-9B3E-D94C08F14A0D.jpeg
    The flight attendant looks like Lewinsky.
     
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