on a lighter note...

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Two Tall Trees

Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods.

A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?

The birch reply's that he cannot tell, but just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling.

The birch says, Woodpecker, you are a tree expert.

Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?

The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies, 'It is neither a son of a beech nor a son
of a birch.
It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever poked my pecker into.
 
Lucky Cops



Two Texas Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement on Highway 77, just south of Kingsville, Texas.



One of the officers was using a hand-held radar device to check for speeding vehicles approaching the town of Kingsville. The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour and climbing. The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and then it suddenly turned off.

Just then a deafening roar over the mesquite treetops on Highway 77 revealed that the radar had in fact, locked on to a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low-flying exercise near its Naval Air home base location in Kingsville.

Back at the Texas Highway Patrol Headquarters in Corpus Christi the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the U. S. Naval Base Commander in Kingsville for shutting down his equipment.

The reply came back in true USMC style:


"Thank you for your letter . . ."You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked on to, your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it, which is why it shut down."

"Furthermore, an air-to-ground missile aboard the fully-armed aircraft had also automatically locked on to your equipment's location."

"Fortunately, the marine pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched to destroy the hostile radar position on the side of Highway 77, south of Kingsville."

"The pilot suggests you cover your mouths when swearing at them, since the video systems on these jets are very high tech."


"Sergeant Johnson, the officer holding the radar gun, should get his dentist to check his left molar. It appears the filling is loose. Also, the snap is broken on his holster."


Semper Fi
 
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What trail is this young lady on?

This is just the motivation I need to get out on hiking trails and off game trails in the woods.


UPDATE:
I was just arrested for stalking.
Girlfriend arrested for assault with intent to commit body injury and attempted murder. Because I couldnt take my eyes off and continued to follow this young lady.

The ranger and my girlfriend just wouldn't accept the excuse: I'm no pervert. I'm not following the young lady. I'm following her backpack.

As soon as I am released from the hospital, I have to appear in court.
 

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Impact shots from the last hunt

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Mature Eland Bull taken in Tanzania, at 100 yards, with 375 H&H, 300gr, Federal Premium Expanding bullet.

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