ZIMBABWE: Hunting Elephant Near Hwange With Mbalabala Safaris

[Medicine]

Frequently asked questions:

1. What the hell is this?

Answer: It started as a hunting report that turned into a story that wrote itself.

2. Is this true?

Answer: You bet your sweet ass.

3. Why so many cuss words in the beginning?

Answer: Because that's how we talk where I'm from and I wanted to show that Ishmael had changed by the end.

4. What are your plans for it?

Answer: Make it PG and self publish for my children.

5. Are the names you used the actual names?

Answer: Some of them.

6. Are you mad at "Dan Spaulding" for ruining you?

Answer: No, he is my friend.

7. How many deer did you really shoot?

Answer: Count the words of the story and divide by 2.

8. What's the best whitetail bullet in history?

Answer: Without a doubt, señor, the discontinued 150 grain Hornady spire point in .270 WBY Mag.
Second place: The 7mm Rem Mag 154 grain discontinued Hornady spire point.

9. What was in it for your apprentices?

Answer: Adventure and an allotment of 3-4 deer per trip.

10. Do you really think your identity will not be uncovered after this?

Answer: No

 

[Jörg Krüger]

This was just an incredible experience to read.
Thank you so much

 

[PARA45]

Bravo, bravo!!!!!!! What a beautiful experience and how it was written. I'm sad that it's over, hopefully there is another in the making. Thank you!

Question? Did the deer shooting take place in Georgia? I ask because here in GA, you can't do anything with them. In my opinion, it's a screwy law, and a waste.

 

[Aaron N]

And so it concludes! If ever there is a compilation of short hunting stories to be published, this needs to be put in it.

Please keep Ishmael safe next year upon your return Zimbabwe

 

[Mauser78]

Thank you for sharing this adventure with us. And dont worry about your room mates and there head counts, I will surely prefer your one shot safari over a day at the cotton fields.

 

[Mort Hill]

I am going to reread this thread again. All of it. It is that entertaining and evokes so many personal memories throughout.

 

[Texas Sharpshooter Fallacy]

I've hunted my whole life. I've killed a number of animals but certainly nothing earth shattering. By many objective standards, if it is even possible to convert mathematically, that would make me a low success rate hunter. Number of animals taken divided by days/hours afield...blah blah blah. That's never bothered me.

Of course, I enjoy the act of hunting and the success of killing - being an active participant in the natural process. But I far more relish the head space of being out there. On the hunt. In nature. Focused on the task at hand but also given permission to let the mind wander.

You've captured that feeling well. Thank you.

 

[cls]

Fun report, thanks for the entertaining report.

 

[fish hunter]

To bad the story is over. I throughly enjoyed it and your title “chasing the dragon” is absolutely perfect.

 

[Medicine]

Thank you everyone for the kind words. I am aware of the typos and that certain things don't make sense in some of the earlier posts. My original plan was to end it just after post #50 with one last entry of the buffalo being passed after the revelation that the protagonist may or may not facilitate death as part of his job. At that time, I was still hopeful of a magazine feature and felt no one would touch it if it included mention of any culling work. Think about it, a piece about an elephant hunt and nighttime deer slaughter. I suppose I could put a confederate flag on the cover, a preface about collared lion hunts and end with an expose on abortion and it would not be any less desirable. However, I knew that it would not explain the proficiencies and sensed that some of you were beginning to think it was simply a braggart piece by a one hit wonder.
I suppose that's when I gave up on anonymity and publishment and threw caution to the wind. Of course, Jerome knows who I am and has been gracious in allowing me to edit after the 30 minute time limit and I will rely on him to allow me to clean up any remaining issues. To those of you who have figured out who I am, thank you for keeping my secret for at least another two years.
Ishmael

 

[mark-hunter]

Another mistery @Medicine ?!
What is happening after next 2 years?

 

[Edster]

2 years is that when the statute of limitations runs out

 

[Medicine]

2 years is that when the statute of limitations runs out

No but that's funny. I will PM you the reason as I have done @mark-hunter.

 

[LivingTheDream]

There is an election in a little less than 2 years...

 

[kudukid]

Medicine, I have never before read a Hunt Report that has invoked such deep thinking. The fact that you are an inanimate object makes it all the more incredible.
I can’t wait until you report back after next year’s hunt in Makuti chasing black death. That is assuming Ishmael can trust you again after your “loose lips” in revealing a little too much information in this report.
Medicine, my friend, sleep well in the gun safe beside your buddies. You have earned a rest!

 

[Medicine]

Medicine, I have never before read a Hunt Report that has invoked such deep thinking. The fact that you are an inanimate object makes it all the more incredible.
I can’t wait until you report back after next year’s hunt in Makuti chasing black death. That is assuming Ishmael can trust you again after your “loose lips” in revealing a little too much information in this report.
Medicine, my friend, sleep well in the gun safe beside your buddies. You have earned a rest!

Thank you for your post. And your earlier one. Without it, I don’t know if I would have had the courage to reveal the source of the automaticity. The story is definitely better because of you.

 

[Backyardsniper]

Beautiful writing. Truly enjoyed reading it.

 

[VertigoBE]

Mistery upon mistery @Medicine ! But thank you for having taken us along. It is rare the hunter (usually a practical lot) who has serious literary skills.

 

[jacques smith]

Wow. Just wow
Took me 4 separate readings to finish, but truly entertaining. Basie dankie

 

[Close Range]

One of the best reports I’ve read in a long time! Thank you!
You certainly won’t hear me judging you for your participation in turning 80lb 8 pts into 230 lb healthy ones. Great job!