on a lighter note...

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When You're 70 & a Veteran

I was standing at the bar at the VFW one night minding my own business.
This fat ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said,
"You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?"
I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?"
She said, "Yeah, I got a pen".
I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."
Cost me 6 stitches . . . but when you’re seventy -- who cares?
**********
I went to the drug store and told the clerk "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."
Lady Clerk: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?”
I said "Nah -- She's pretty good lookin' . . . . . . "
When you’re seventy -- who cares?
***********

I was talking to a young woman in the VFW last night.
She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right.”
I said, “If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”
Cost me a fat lip, but when you’re seventy -- who cares?
**********

I was telling a woman in the Club about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts.
"Really" she said, "Go on then . . . try."
After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"
I said, "Yesterday."
Cost me a kick in the nuts, but when you’re seventy -- who cares?
*********

I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
When you’re seventy -- who cares?
 
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Shotgun Coach wrote on Tdruck's profile.
In the RSA
Turner024 wrote on JG26Irish_2's profile.
Would you be willing to talk sometime about your experience with RDB? More so what you would recommened taking. I will be going in May.
Tdruck wrote on Shotgun Coach's profile.
Good morning,
Did you hunt w Leeuwkop at their ranch or in Zimbabwe? The ranch looks awesome, but I'll be in Zimbabwe for buffalo and whatever else we dig up.
What did you hunt for?
Vaccines?
What rifle did you use?
I feel like I need a good cotton safari shirt and an ammo belt to make the hunt feel right!
How often did you shoot prior to going?
Did you use sticks for shooting practice?



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