Wedding etiquette?

[CEO]

This is walking a tight rope, over an alligator pit, while someone prods you with a stick. I would definitely go solo.

Now that I've said that; I would probably offer to have my gf take the best friend shopping on my dime. Use the gf to keep her in check as far as the cost goes.

 

[ActionBob]

Just tell your gf you are willing to chip in because of the inconvenience to her friend, and then let her handle it.

This is above any man’s pay grade.

This is the second best advice offered. The best is go alone.

 

[Bert the Turtle]

Rental dress. There are places with very high end dresses for far less than the cost of buying a fairly nice dress.
If she insists on buying the Real Real has very nice items that are pre-owned.

 

[Major Bonkers]

By coincidence, I have received a photograph on WhatsApp of a dress that I believe may be suitable.

 

[Bob Nelson 35Whelen]

I would just straight up ask her if it's ok to help her out monetarily because it's hard to know anymore what's "correct", but that you would like to help out if she's ok with it. If she's agreed to go with you in the first place then she surely knows you well enough to not be offended.

Of course that's what I would do...but I'm known to be quite direct...and not particularly famous for tact.

@Randy F
You are about as subtle as a kick in the arse from an enraged mule mate but it's a good quality.
Bob

 

[Randy F]

@Randy F
You are about as subtle as a kick in the arse from an enraged mule mate but it's a good quality.
Bob

Thank you for noticing Bob, I can always count on you.

 

[Randy F]

View attachment 417854By coincidence, I have received a photograph on WhatsApp of a dress that I believe may be suitable.

I just spit coke all over the laptop on that one.

 

[Tubby’s Canteen]

I’m sure a fine gentleman such as @Major Bonkers would also suggest splurging for pearls to bring the package to completion

 

[CBH Australia]

I am sort of inexperienced so take this as you will.
Was your date already going to attend the wedding, or is she going as a favor to you?
If it is just a favor, does she already possess the appropriate attire, or does she have to go buy it.
If she does not have it, and has to buy it, I would offer to compensate her for it, as to not inconvenience her financially. Provided it is Okay with her friend, your girlfriend.

Here we go someone had to apply commonsense.
It might be the safest option in this scenario.
I really don't know if there is a right answer as she might see it differently.

 

[WAB]

My thoughts exactly. This seems like a set-up. Save the money and put it towards your next African adventure, BUT if you're gonna go down, do it in a blaze of glory.

@Skinnersblade how cool is your GF? Does she have a good sense of humor? Maybe joke with her that you're willing to help with either the dress or the undergarments (or lack there of).

Hey, we like this guy, don’t try to get him killed!

 

[Randy F]

Hey, we like this guy, don’t try to get him killed!

+1

 

[CoElkHunter]

I’m sure a fine gentleman such as @Major Bonkers would also suggest splurging for pearls to bring the package to completion

Absolutely PERFECT! Ha! Ha!

 

[CJW]

Return the suit, skip the wedding and take her out to a nice dinner and a movie while your GF is gone, as friends of course. Paying $1k to be in someone else's wedding is ludicrous.

 

[CoElkHunter]

Your girlfriend's friend? I see a great big noose tightening around your neck. Let her accompany you but do not get financially or otherwise involved. You'll have double trouble and end up with no girl. My voice of experience for what it's worth.

+1. I’m still thinking about the bride being an “unworldly creature of nightmares”? Your girlfriend’s friend must know the bride I’m assuming? What happens if you say something unflattering about the bride to your “date” and she tells the nightmare bride or worse yet tells your girlfriend? Sounds like a potential minefield of poor outcomes? Whatever you decide to do, I wouldn’t hang around the reception too long.

 

[Tubby’s Canteen]

+1. I’m still thinking about the bride being an “unworldly creature of nightmares”? Your girlfriend’s friend must know the bride I’m assuming? What happens if you say something unflattering about the bride to your “date” and she tells the nightmare bride or worse yet tells your girlfriend? Sounds like a potential minefield of poor outcomes? Whatever you decide to do, I wouldn’t hang around the reception too long.

I also plan to stay completely sober

 

[npm352]

That's a tough one. None of my friends would think of planning a wedding for early October and expect me to show up, best man or not. Hunting season

 

[CoElkHunter]

I also plan to stay completely sober

Great decision under the circumstances. I’d also be careful of the “etiquette” of the photos taken with your date. Sometimes a photo may be misconstrued by a girlfriend? Of course, this is your girlfriend’s idea, so?

 

[Saul]

Reading through these posts has been a real hoot.

 

[Aaron N]

Does the friend know the bride or groom? If not, I feel like your gf is putting her there as a spy or babysitter.

Personally, I don’t think you owe her anything, because she really doesn’t need to be there. You’ll be busy with the wedding party.

 

[Tubby’s Canteen]

To clarify the friend does not know the bride and only knows the groom through me.