You might be an African Safari hunter if……

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If you use your DGR as a laxative. My 404 Jeffery kicks the shit out of me.
 
When you look in your gun room and realize that a .450-400 double rifle, two .375's and three 9.3's might not cover all of your larger game hunting plans
 
I avoid wearing the safari getup while traveling. I do wear hunting clothes but they look more like something worn to work ... at a hardware store. My boots are inconspicuous. No camo or bespoke safari footwear. I've had people ask at the airport what's the long case for. "Saxaphone." If I was decked out in camo, I'm sure they wouldn't need to ask. I am a hunter but no need to advertise that I enjoy killing things. No Browning buck or Ducks Unlimited decals on my Jimmy's back window.

Guess I'm just not into branding myself. But that's just me.
This is one of very few things I agree with you on, Sir.

I wear tactical green and khaki but I don’t put any gun or hunting related stickers on my vehicles. I actually don’t take pleasure in killing. After the target is down, animal or human, I feel a sense of sadness and melancholy.

I enjoy the process of hunting and the challenge. I also know where my food comes from and find it more ethical to kill what I eat by my hand and if I can’t bring the meat home I want to know that it’s not going to waste.
 
This is one of very few things I agree with you on, Sir.

I wear tactical green and khaki but I don’t put any gun or hunting related stickers on my vehicles. I actually don’t take pleasure in killing. After the target is down, animal or human, I feel a sense of sadness and melancholy.

I enjoy the process of hunting and the challenge. I also know where my food comes from and find it more ethical to kill what I eat by my hand and if I can’t bring the meat home I want to know that it’s not going to waste.
Agree with you on stickers as this is a great way to get robbed.
I don’t feel the same way when shooting something or someone. If it’s a human it’s a huge sense of relief it was them and not me or mine. If it’s an animal it’s a celebration. I truly respect the process of hunting and in my experience there are a lot worse ways to end a life well lived than a fast surprise bullet. I don’t celebrate the kill as much as I celebrate the life, no matter if it is a human or animal.
 

You might be an African Safari hunter if you have multiple mounts ready for pick-up at the taxidermist while trying to get your last trophies shipped home from Africa as you are getting on the plane for your current hunt.

 
You might be an African Safari Hunter if as a retiree you have your current safaris in your long term investment plan and you discuss with your investment advisor having less cash left to your estate, so that you can convince your wife that the safaris you are adding to your long term plan allow the two of you to still achieve your estate planning goals.
 
You might be an African Safari Hunter when your two-factor authentication code starts out 458375 and you're disappointed when it finishes 20 vs. 404, 470, 416,...
 
You may be a future African Safari Hunter if you're sitting in the back of class with a Safari Times magazine open between the pages of the your geometry book.
 
Sitting in Joberg airport waiting to get on my plane to Atlanta after a wonderful plains game hunt. (Hunt report will be posted after I have a chance to absorb all that happened)
Got to thinking it might be fun to start you might be a African Safari hunter if thread:

I will start. You might be an African Safari hunter if you wear your hunting boots on the plane and you look for other hunting boots at the airport.
If you wear your Africa clothes complete with boots and hat on social occasions and your wife does not want to seen with you
 
If your girlfriend, who may be 10 years younger than you, asks “when are we going to a tropical island on vacation instead of you going on another Safari?

And your reply is: “Do they have trophy animals I can hunt?”

Or

“I don’t answer questions about hunting that start with a W or an H!”
 
When you look forward to the SCI and DSC show season like it a second Xmas.

When you continue reading your book in bed in the Caprivi while beetles crawl in your hair and face.

When you have multiple used bullets (some solids) on your work desk.

When MN 80 degree temps feel cold after 104 degrees in Africa.
 

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