Tall Tales II

steve white

AH legend
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dallas tx
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2
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dallas safari club, mannlicher collectors assoc., era
Hunted
Cape buffalo, plains game
OK, here is the post to let it all hang out--in the proud tradition of the old Texas Liars Contest.

"Back in the 2011 drought Lake Ray Hubbard got so low the old roadbed from the golf course to Hwy 66 appeared above water again. Folks actually set up lawn chairs fishing from it. One fellow with an old Penn Senator flung out a perch under a bobber and a big flathead catfish took off with it--right into the open window of an old '59 Buick that had been shoved off the road back before the lake filled up. What to do!!?? It thrashed around in there, sawing the braided line back and forth on the rusted window frame. If he didn't get it out soon, the line would wear through! He fought hard, but he didn't get it....that old catfish just rolled up the window....
 
A man is driving down a deserted country road when he has a blowout. Not having a spare he finally finds a house and asks the lady if he can use her phone to call for a tow-truck. As she opens the door for him to come in, a Three Legged Pig runs out.

He asks "why does that Pig only have three legs?"

She says that they had a fire and the pig woke everybody up and then went back and brought the dog out.

He said "but why does the Pig only have three legs?"

She said well another time my son was playing on the ice and it broke and he fell in and the Pig ran to the barn and got a rope and saved him.

Again he asked "why does the Pig only have three legs?"

After all the Pig did for us, it didn't seem right to eat him all at once.

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/animaljokes/threeleggedpigjoke.html
 
Part of The Team Fet Family Legend Series, my uncle was stationed on Attu Island during WW2. While standing guard duty along the shore a Japanese sub surfaced not far from the shore. My uncle sounded the alarm and then engaged the submarine with his M1 rifle. After 8 direct hits from the rifle the submarine sank below the waves never to be seen again.
 
OK, here is the post to let it all hang out--in the proud tradition of the old Texas Liars Contest.

"Back in the 2011 drought Lake Ray Hubbard got so low the old roadbed from the golf course to Hwy 66 appeared above water again. Folks actually set up lawn chairs fishing from it. One fellow with an old Penn Senator flung out a perch under a bobber and a big flathead catfish took off with it--right into the open window of an old '59 Buick that had been shoved off the road back before the lake filled up. What to do!!?? It thrashed around in there, sawing the braided line back and forth on the rusted window frame. If he didn't get it out soon, the line would wear through! He fought hard, but he didn't get it....that old catfish just rolled up the window....
@steve white
Reminds me of the time when I was trucking. I picked up Sn American hitch hiker. Well turns out he was from Texas and all he did was brag about how big everything in Texas was. When we got to the Moomba gas field we overlaid a map of Texas on the map of the gas field. Naturally the gas field was bigger than the state of Texas.
The site overseer then proceeded to tell this clown about the time the had a Texan die on site and how they buried the good 'ol boy in a shoe box.
The Texan protested loudly saying the average Texan was a BIG man and was curious of how they could fit such a large man in a shoe box.
The overseer smiled gently and replied it's very easy you just give them an enema before they die. Once all the bullshit is gone they ain't that big. The overseer walked off with a large smile and a little chuckle.
Bob
 
@steve white
Reminds me of the time when I was trucking. I picked up Sn American hitch hiker. Well turns out he was from Texas and all he did was brag about how big everything in Texas was. When we got to the Moomba gas field we overlaid a map of Texas on the map of the gas field. Naturally the gas field was bigger than the state of Texas.
The site overseer then proceeded to tell this clown about the time the had a Texan die on site and how they buried the good 'ol boy in a shoe box.
The Texan protested loudly saying the average Texan was a BIG man and was curious of how they could fit such a large man in a shoe box.
The overseer smiled gently and replied it's very easy you just give them an enema before they die. Once all the bullshit is gone they ain't that big. The overseer walked off with a large smile and a little chuckle.
Bob
Yep, we get that a lot, lol
 

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