OLD People have Problems that you haven't even considered yet!

AkMike

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An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.



The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'



The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.



The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this -- first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.



'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in,then with her teeth out, still nothing.



'We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing..'



The doctor was shocked!



'You asked your neighbour?'

The old man replied,


'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'

And what were you thinking!
_________________________
 
Good snicker.
Damn jars...
 
Now that's funny!:ROFLMAO:
 
An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.



The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'



The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.



The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this -- first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.



'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in,then with her teeth out, still nothing.



'We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing..'



The doctor was shocked!



'You asked your neighbour?'

The old man replied,


'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'

And what were you thinking!
_________________________
@AkMike
Very good.
Old man was reading the paper during breakfast when his darling wife says to him.
Sweet heart do you realize today is our anniversary. We've been married 50 years today, fifty years and I still get that same warm feeling in my chest as I did when I first met you.

Husband lowers the paper and looks at her and says that's nice dear, but if you took your left boob out of your cup of tea you m at not have that same warm feeling.

Bob
 
Husband and wife move into a retirement village and get invited to the neighbors for a meal.
During the meal the neighbor is calling his wife love, sweetheart, darling and other beautiful names.

While the wives are doing the dishes the visitor says to the other gentlemen that's really nice calling your wife all those beautiful names she must be very happy with it.
The other man replies I call her all those names because I forgot her proper name a few years ago and I'm not game enough to tell her.
Bob
 

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