The Hypnotist

Discussion in 'Humorous Jokes, Stories or Pictures' started by Buff-Buster, Feb 14, 2013.

  1. Buff-Buster

    Buff-Buster GOLD SUPPORTER AH Elite

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2011
    Messages:
    1,047
    Likes Received:
    65
    Location:
    Hempstead, Texas
    My Photos:
    78
    Member of:
    Houston Safari Club, Gulf Coast SCI, SCI International. Rowland Ward, NRA, RMEF, Nort American Hunting Club - Life Member, Texas Trophy Hunters
    Hunted:
    Mozambique, South Africa, (Kwa-Zulu Natal & East Cape), Zimbabwe (Charisa & West Nicholson), U.S.(Texas, New Mexico, LA, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Wyoming & Montana), Canada (Alberta) & Argentina (Cordoba)
    It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' centre.
    After the community sing song led by Alice at the piano
    It was time for the Star of the Show-
    Claude the Hypnotist!
    Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance.
    "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude.
    The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from his waistcoat pocket
    A beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
    "I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see.
    "It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations"
    Said Claude.
    He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting
    "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch"

    The audience became mesmerised as the watch swayed back and forth.
    The lights twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.
    A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch.
    And then,
    Suddenly,
    The chain broke!!!
    The beautiful antique gold pocket watch that had been in Claude's family for six generations fell to the stage and burst
    Burst apart on impact"


    "SHIT" said Claude.


    It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens' Centre

    And Claude was never invited to entertain again
     
  2. spike.t

    spike.t GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2010
    Messages:
    2,923
    Likes Received:
    113
    My Photos:
    131
    Member of:
    sci int, basc
    Hunted:
    zambia, tanzania, zimbabwe, hungary, france, england
    :laughing::laughing::laughing::clap:
     
  3. Nyati

    Nyati AH Legend

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2011
    Messages:
    2,645
    Likes Received:
    39
    Location:
    Madrid, Spain
    My Photos:
    40
    Member of:
    RFEC, RFETO
    Hunted:
    Finland, RSA ( KwaZulu Natal, Limpopo, North West ), Spain
    :clap::clap::clap:
     
  4. bluey

    bluey GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    May 21, 2012
    Messages:
    2,626
    Likes Received:
    126
    Location:
    38.12.23south 149.50.37 east
    My Photos:
    29
    Member of:
    ssaa, aba ,bairnsdale field archers
    Hunted:
    australia south africa (limpopo, north west,eastcape) canada (b.c)
    ha ha ha ha :cool:
     
  5. Bobpuckett

    Bobpuckett GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2009
    Messages:
    3,968
    Likes Received:
    45
    Location:
    Russellville
    My Photos:
    27
    Member of:
    NAHC Life Member, NRA Life Member,SCI, Buckmasters
    Hunted:
    USA(from Coast to Coast and Alaska), Germany, South Africa, Canada
    :laughing: that Joke stinks. LOL
     

Share This Page