Q & A

Discussion in 'Humorous Jokes, Stories or Pictures' started by AkMike, May 2, 2014.

  1. AkMike

    AkMike AH Fanatic

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    *Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who
    are interested in them?*

    *A: Try a bookstore, under fiction.*



    *Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?*

    *A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the
    basement. When you're done you'll have a place to live.*



    *Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible.
    Is that true? Where can it be found?

    *A: Yes. Matthew 14:92:
    "And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt."*



    *Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60-plus year old
    husband?*

    *A: Tell him you're pregnant.



    *Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?*

    *A: Take off your glasses.*



    *Q: Seriously! What can I do for these Crow's feet and all those
    wrinkles on my face?*

    *A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.*



    *Q: Why should 60-plus year old people use valet parking?*

    *A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.*



    *Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short
    term memory storage?*

    *A: Storing memory is not a problem.*
    *Retrieving it is the problem.*



    *Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?*

    *A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.*



    *Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?*

    *A: On their foreheads.*



    *Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when
    they enter antique stores?*

    *A: "Gosh, I remember these!"*



    *SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor, RIGHT?* :beers:
     
  2. Craig Willey

    Craig Willey BRONZE SUPPORTER AH Member

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    A 95-year old man goes into confession. The priest asks what he is there for. The old man says: "Last night I was driving home, and saw these two 25-year old girls hitch hiking. I picked them up, and they decided to take me to a motel. We stayed up all night drinking, smoking, and having sex. I left the motel at noon today."
    Priest: "What are you confessing?"
    Old man: "I'm not confessing anything."
    Priest: "You are catholic, aren't you?"
    Old man: "NO, I'm Jewish!"
    Priest: Why are you telling me all of this?"
    Old man: "I'm 95 years old, I'm telling everyone!"
     
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  3. AkMike

    AkMike AH Fanatic

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  4. PHOENIX PHIL

    PHOENIX PHIL AH Legend

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    Nice on both of those, but Mike you're avatar is whiggin' me out a little.
     
  5. AkMike

    AkMike AH Fanatic

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    What? You don't like the sight of a naked chick having a beer? :whistle:
     
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  6. bluey

    bluey GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    not a crossed eyed one ,no ....
     
  7. AkMike

    AkMike AH Fanatic

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    Awww Bluey, just look at the size of her breasts!

    Then there are those lovely legs.. So tender...
     
  8. bluey

    bluey GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    good point
    l do like lovely thighs
    but im breast man ,personally my self
     
  9. Nyati

    Nyati AH Legend

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  10. Bobpuckett

    Bobpuckett GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

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    Mike I think the cabin fever has set in on you wrong kind of chick.:eek:
     
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  11. AkMike

    AkMike AH Fanatic

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    Nah, Just get her hot and bothered then butter her up! :whistle:
     
  12. ArmyGrunt

    ArmyGrunt AH Veteran

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    but then...
     

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