Phil's scrotum..

Discussion in 'Humorous Jokes, Stories or Pictures' started by observe, Mar 1, 2012.

  1. observe

    observe CONTRIBUTOR AH Fanatic

    Joined:
    May 24, 2011
    Messages:
    917
    Likes Received:
    16
    My Photos:
    86
    Member of:
    SAHGCA [Skilled Hunter qualified-Cum Laude], Handgun Hunters Assosiation of SA, Bowhunting, SAGA, Provincial Heavy caliber target shooting teams, Bisley qualified, Army sharpshooter rifle & pistol qualified, ...
    Hunted:
    R.S.A,Namibia,Venda
    The Church pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to expresspraise for their answered prayers.
    Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium.
    She said, "I have a praise."

    "Two months ago, my husband, Phil, had a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was completely crushed.
    The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
    You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Phil must have experienced.
    "Phil was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain.

    "We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Phil's scrotum, and wrapped wire around it to hold it in place."

    Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the
    horrible surgery performed on Phil.
    "Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Phil is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely".

    All the men sighed with unified relief.
    The Pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.
    A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.

    He said, "I'm Phil."

    The entire congregation held its breath.

    "I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."

    :doh2: :doh2:
     
  2. PHOENIX PHIL

    PHOENIX PHIL AH Legend

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2009
    Messages:
    2,407
    Likes Received:
    101
    My Photos:
    23
    Member of:
    SCI
    Hunted:
    USA, S. Africa
    You can imagine the unnerving reaction I had when I saw the title of this thread!
     
  3. TOM

    TOM AH Elite

    Joined:
    May 14, 2009
    Messages:
    1,614
    Likes Received:
    6
    My Photos:
    41
    Member of:
    SCI,DSC, QDMA, QU
    Hunted:
    Africa...are there other continents to hunt?
    That's great!
     
  4. James.Grage

    James.Grage GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2010
    Messages:
    2,721
    Likes Received:
    72
    My Photos:
    73
    Member of:
    NRA, ATA, PITA, NAHC, NAFC, DU, TU, DSC, SCI, RMEF
    Hunted:
    USA - Canada -Tanzania, South Africa, Zimbabwe
    good one
     
  5. Nyati

    Nyati AH Legend

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2011
    Messages:
    2,653
    Likes Received:
    39
    Location:
    Madrid, Spain
    My Photos:
    40
    Member of:
    RFEC, RFETO
    Hunted:
    Finland, RSA ( KwaZulu Natal, Limpopo, North West ), Spain
    :clapping:
     
  6. Baydog

    Baydog AH Veteran

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2011
    Messages:
    120
    Likes Received:
    0
    Member of:
    Member SCI, QDMA
    that story made me cringe....good ending...
     
  7. Bobpuckett

    Bobpuckett GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2009
    Messages:
    3,972
    Likes Received:
    45
    Location:
    Russellville
    My Photos:
    27
    Member of:
    NAHC Life Member, NRA Life Member,SCI, Buckmasters
    Hunted:
    USA(from Coast to Coast and Alaska), Germany, South Africa, Canada
    Good one I know PHIL Enjoyed it.
     
  8. fhm3006

    fhm3006 AH Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2009
    Messages:
    358
    Likes Received:
    0
    My Photos:
    31
    Hunted:
    Namibia / South-Africa
    ;)Good joke !
     
  9. BigLou

    BigLou AH Member

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2012
    Messages:
    13
    Likes Received:
    0
    My Photos:
    6
    Member of:
    SCI
    Hunted:
    Canada, South Africa
    Good one!
     

Share This Page