duck hunting attorney

Discussion in 'Humorous Jokes, Stories or Pictures' started by gillettehunter, Jan 28, 2013.

  1. gillettehunter

    gillettehunter AH Fanatic

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2009
    Messages:
    517
    Likes Received:
    6
    My Photos:
    4
    Hunted:
    Namibia, Kyrgyzstan South Africa
    A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Tennessee . He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and
    asked him what he was doing.

    The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

    The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

    The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the United States and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

    The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in Tennessee . We settle small disagreements with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"

    The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

    The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

    The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney.

    His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees.

    His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

    The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

    The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "O'kay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

    The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck.":)
  2. Buff-Buster

    Buff-Buster GOLD SUPPORTER AH Elite

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2011
    Messages:
    1,074
    Likes Received:
    9
    Location:
    Hempstead, Texas
    My Photos:
    78
    Member of:
    Houston Safari Club, Gulf Coast SCI, SCI International. Rowland Ward, NRA, RMEF, Nort American Hunting Club - Life Member, Texas Trophy Hunters
    Hunted:
    Mozambique, South Africa, (Kwa-Zulu Natal & East Cape), Zimbabwe (Charisa & West Nicholson), U.S.(Texas, New Mexico, LA, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Wyoming & Montana), Canada (Alberta) & Argentina (Cordoba)
    :clap::clap::beer:
  3. Nyati

    Nyati AH Legend

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2011
    Messages:
    2,439
    Likes Received:
    12
    Location:
    Madrid, Spain
    My Photos:
    40
    Member of:
    RFEC, RFETO
    Hunted:
    Finland, RSA ( KwaZulu Natal, Limpopo, North West ), Spain
    :clap::clap::clap:
  4. Bobpuckett

    Bobpuckett GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2009
    Messages:
    3,848
    Likes Received:
    18
    Location:
    Russellville
    My Photos:
    27
    Member of:
    NAHC Life Member, NRA Life Member,SCI, Buckmasters
    Hunted:
    USA(from Coast to Coast and Alaska), Germany, South Africa, Canada
    LMAO :laughing:
  5. bluey

    bluey GOLD SUPPORTER AH Legend

    Joined:
    May 21, 2012
    Messages:
    2,324
    Likes Received:
    36
    Location:
    38.12.23south 149.50.37 east
    My Photos:
    27
    Member of:
    ssaa, aba ,bairnsdale field archers
    Hunted:
    australia south africa (limpopo) canada (b.c)
    ding ding ding ding weve got a winner
  6. timbear

    timbear AH Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2011
    Messages:
    427
    Likes Received:
    0
    Member of:
    SSAA, NZDA
    Hunted:
    Germany, NZ, Australia
    :bighello:Superb! I really needed a good laugh right now!:clap::rockon::laughing::crazylol::peace:

Share This Page