CHINESE HOTEL BROCHURE...

DOC-404

AH elite
Joined
Jan 25, 2011
Messages
1,242
Reaction score
362
Media
57
Hunting reports
Africa
1
A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. Clearly it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English, and some of the original meaning has taken a major detour along the way!

The hotel:

This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery.
Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children.
Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar.
We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with themself.

Getting there:

Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water.
You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend.
The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.

The restaurant:

Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.

Your room:

Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts.
In winter, every room is on heat.
Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity!

The bed:

Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her.
She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.

Above all:

When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it.

:wacky:
 
;)--:first:
 
:rofl: sounds like my kind of place. :wacky::laughing::first:
 
OMG! Somebody needs a English marketing director!
 
Some of it sounds interesting, where did you say that hotel is ? :wink:
 

Forum statistics

Threads
53,627
Messages
1,131,464
Members
92,687
Latest member
JohnT3006
 

 

 

Latest posts

Latest profile posts

Impact shots from the last hunt

Early morning Impala hunt, previous link was wrong video

Headshot on jackal this morning

Mature Eland Bull taken in Tanzania, at 100 yards, with 375 H&H, 300gr, Federal Premium Expanding bullet.

20231012_145809~2.jpg
 
Top