Most definitely tell your outfitter to drop the trophies off at a dip and pack place of business. If he or she balks at all, tell them you feel more comfortable with this arrangement.
As far as the cummunication problems...I think the outfitter doesn't match your personality 100 percent. You like them, like their hunting grounds, but wish they would communicate better....there is a personality difference that will never be resolved.
The experiences you have had in RSA are not normal and I know very few people that would put up with bad service.