Free Hunt for One Hunter & One Observer from Lianga Safaris for 2016

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What is the difference between a leech and a lawyer?

The leech stops sucking you dry after you're dead.
 
Definition of a Lawyer: A person who puts two men into a fight and runs off with their clothes.
 
On vacation in Hawaii, my step- mom, Sandy, called a café to make reservations for 7 p.m. Checking her book, the cheery young hostess said, "I’m sorry, all we have is 6:45. Would you like that?"

"That’s fine," Sandy said.

"Okay," the woman confirmed. Then she added, "Just be advised you may have to wait 15 minutes for your table."
 
I’d rather spend ten minutes 
rearranging the dishwasher to 
accommodate something than spend 30 seconds washing it by hand.
 
I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my 
first child.
 
I don’t know that there are real ghosts and goblins, but there are always more trick-or-treaters than neighborhood kids.
 
Halloween is the beginning of the holiday shopping season. That’s for women. The beginning of the holiday shopping season for men is Christmas Eve.
 
A sign said, “Do not allow your dog to chase, 
injure, or worry wildlife.” How is a dog going to “worry” wildlife? Run up to a bird: “Hey, I think you’ve got something on your beak. It could be a tumor.”
 
“Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance.” 
—Alcohol
 
My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of killing it. We went and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a lawyer.
 
We use a really strong sunblock when we go to the beach with the kids. It’s SPF 80: You squeeze the tube, and a sweater comes out.
 
Q: How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: You need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
 
Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Four: one to climb the ladder, one to hold the ladder, one to shake the ladder and one to sue the ladder company.
 
Because I am always telling Mother-in -law jokes my wife accused me of not liking Mother-in-laws. To which I replied to my wife "Ridiculous, I like your mother-in-law more than my own".
 
Some people cause happiness wherever they go... others cause happiness whenever they go.
 
Someone gave me the wrong directions to a massage parlor, and it rubbed me the wrong way.
 
Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
A: "Put it on my bill."
 
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
 
An organization is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.
 
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Cwoody wrote on Woodcarver's profile.
Shot me email if Beretta 28 ga DU is available
Thank you
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Pancho wrote on Safari Dave's profile.
Enjoyed reading your post again. Believe this is the 3rd time. I am scheduled to hunt w/ Legadema in Sep. Really looking forward to it.
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HENRY GRIFFITHS SAFARIS
HENRY GRIFFITHS SAFARIS
check out our Buff hunt deal!

Buffalo Hunt with Henry Griffiths Safaris $10000

Here with is our offer for a hunt of a...
www.africahunting.com www.africahunting.com
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HENRY GRIFFITHS SAFARIS
HENRY GRIFFITHS SAFARIS
Because of some clients having to move their dates I have 2 prime time slots open if anyone is interested to do a hunt
5-15 May
or 5-15 June is open!
shoot me a message for a good deal!
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dogcat1 wrote on skydiver386's profile.
I would be interested in it if you pass. Please send me the info on the gun shop if you do not buy it. I have the needed ammo and brass.
Thanks,
Ross
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