This is a discussion on Language Difficulties within the Humorous Jokes, Stories or Pictures forums, part of the GENERAL category; Absolutely Brilliant! The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European ...
07-20-2012, 07:04 AM #1
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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.Overkill is underestimated!
07-20-2012, 07:54 AM #2
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good one.Enjoy life now -- it has an expiration date.
07-20-2012, 08:23 AM #3
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LOL, sounds like the SS officer, Herr Flick, in the famous British TV serie, Allo Allo.....
The best hunt are the one in your dreams, the next best are the one in your memories.
07-20-2012, 11:44 AM #4
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07-22-2012, 01:02 AM #5
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Hotfire Hunting & Fishing Safaris
By DUGABOY1 in forum General ChatReplies: 5Last Post: 03-12-2011, 09:42 PM